Quotes About Humor

That sounded about as likely as Apophis and Ra becoming Facebook buddies, but I decided not to say anything.

You know how teachers tell you the magic word is 'please'? That's not true. The magic word is 'puke'. It will get you out of class faster than anything else.

Beckendorf walked up with his helmet under his arm. 'She likes you, man.' 'Sure,' I muttered. 'She likes me for target practice.' 'Nah, they always do that. A girl starts trying to kill you, you know she's into you. 'Makes a lot of sense.

He faced us. "You hear that, guys? A batch of cookies is depending on me. If you get me killed on the way to camp, I am going be ticked off.

The way Leo figured it, he spent more time crashing than he did flying. If there was a rewards card for frequent crashers, he'd be, like, double platinum level.

I woke to a bucket of ice water in my face. "Sadie! Get up," Zia said. "God!" I yelled. "Was that necessary?" "No," admitted Zia.

Like the zodiac sign?' Percy asked. 'I'm a Leo.' 'No, stupid,' Leo said, 'I'm a Leo. You're a Percy.

Leo smiled nervously. Maybe he and Percy did share something else – a stupid sense of humour. 'Yeah, I bet that would totally be against her sponsorship deal. THOSE ARE NOT THE OFFICIAL SHOES OF THE OLYMPICS! YOU WILL DIE NOW!' Hazel rolled her eyes. 'You're both impossible.' Behind Leo, a thunderous voice shook the ruins: 'YOU WILL DIE NOW!

Some of the best demigods have gotten their start by blowing up toilets.

It wasn't easy looking dignified wearing a bed sheet and a purple cape.

Wouldn't that put a twist in your toga?

He just raised the dead with coke and cheeseburgers

So . . . what is this fire river called?" "The Phlegethon," [Annabeth] said. "You should concentrate on going down." "The Phlegethon ?" [Percy] shinnied along the ledge. They'd made it roughly a third of the way down the cliff—still high enough up to die if they fell. "Sounds like a marathon for hawking spitballs." "Please don't make me laugh," she said. "Just trying to keep things light.

Frank nodded grimly. "Well…any goddess who throws a Ding Dong at a giant can't be all bad. Let's go.

George unhinged his jaw and coughed up a little plastic bottle filled with chewable vitamins. You're kidding, I said. Are those Minotaur-shaped? Hermes picked up the bottle and rattled it. The lemon ones, yes. The grape ones are Furies, I think. Or are they hydras? At any rate, these are potent.

Etiquette tip: If you're looking for the right time to leave a party, when the host yells, No one leaves here alive, that's your cue.

Want to hit Leo? That is understandable Hunk muffin earned it

The last I saw of Percy and Annabeth, their Prius was turning the corner on First Avenue, Percy singing along with Led Zeppelin on the radio, Annabeth laughing at his bad voice. Alex crossed his arms. If those two were any cuter together, they'd cause a nuclear explosion of cuteness and destroy the Eastern Seaboard.

Keep moving. Don't get bogged down. Don't think about the bad stuff. Smile and joke even when you don't feel like it. Especially when you don't feel like it.

No! Leo yelled. Uhhh, Nico groaned from the floor. Piper! Jason cried. Monkey! Frank yelled. Not monkeys, Hazel grumbled. I think those are dwarfs. Stealing my stuff! Leo yelled, and ran for the stairs.

Nosoi?" Percy planted his feet in a fighting stance. "You know, I keep thinking, I have now killed every single thing in Greek mythology. But the list never seems to end." "You haven't killed me yet," I noted. "Don't tempt me.

All right, cupcakes. You are about to see the Grand Canyon. Try not to break it. The skywalk can hold the weight of seventy jumbo jets, to you featherweights should be safe out there. If possible, try to avoid pushing each other over the edge, as that would cause me extra paperwork.

Poseidon raised his eyebrows as they shook hands. "Blowfish, did you say?" Ah, no. Blofis, actually." Oh, I see," Poseidon said. "A shame. I quite like blowfish. I am Poseidon." Poseidon? That's an interesting name." Yes, I like it. I've gone by other names, but I do prefer Poseidon." Like the god of the sea." Very much like that, yes.

So, Annabeth said, are you going to argue about me coming along? Nah. You'd just beat me up. Percy said. She managed a laugh, which was good to hear