Quotes About Humor

I never joined, but I used to go to church now and then. I liked it, because they always passed out plates of money at the end.

A sense of humor...is superior to any religion so far devised.

I'm not going to have a tombstone. I'm going to be tossed in the air. Ashes, tossed like a salad.

I'm an Episcopal, which is Catholic Lite. It's like same religion, half the guilt.

I want everyone out there in TV land to touch the TV. Touch the back of the TV and get a shock for Jesus.

...but I also can't prove that mushrooms could not be intergalactic spaceships spying on us.

Christian - One who is willing to serve three Gods, but draws the line at one wife.

I'm a little vague on the details but aren't doughnuts just the most marvellous thing to ever come out of organised religion?

In anything that does cover the whole of your life - in your philosophy and your religion - you must have mirth. If you do not have mirth you will certainly have madness.

If (Declan) Kidney had gone for religion instead of teaching, he would have been Pope.

Photons have mass? I didn't even know they were Catholic.

If only God would give me a clear sign like making a large deposit in my name at a Swiss bank.

I do benefits for all religions. ... I'd hate to blow the hereafter on a technicality.

If I could only see one miracle just one miracle. Like a burning bush or the seas part or my uncle Sasha pick up a check.

God doesn't send atheists to Hell -- there's no room with all the Christians down there.

I'm not really a Jew just Jew-ish not the whole hog.

It's clear why they only served bread and wine at the Last Supper. It was a potluck . . . organized by men.

When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realized that the Lord in his wisdom didn't work that way. So I just stole one and asked him to forgive me.

I liked the humor of it, I've always enjoyed a sense of humor in God and in religion and in spirituality.

I believe if I Piss God off one more time. I'll be eligible to win a free Bible

Coincidentally, the words RELIGION and BULLSHIT both have eight letters.

God didn't make Eve from Adam's rib. He took out half of Adam's brain by accident.

That's not a religion, that's Pokemon.

I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.