Quotes About Humor

Mostly good is enough. Mostly good produces healthy kids who know they are valued and either forget the other parts or turn them into funny stories.

Thank you, Daylight and Rearview Mirror, for bringing to light the long, wiry chin hairs I missed during my morning tweeze session. You also exposed my eyebrows as an absolute tragedy. I have enough undetected facial hair to qualify me as a Sasquatch,

I can't believe anyone would voluntarily run 26 miles. Sometimes I sit on the couch cross-legged because I don't feel like walking to the bathroom.

I still believe in the Holy Trinity, except now it's Target, Trader Joe's, and IKEA.

Some people are destined to be deep thinkers. I am not one of those people.

You know what it was like? It was like thinking I was heading to a surprise party and instead it was a surprise pap smear.

For the record? I have never been her baby. In fact, I reject the notion of coming out of her body. I prefer to believe I was hatched, or perhaps purchased.

I stuff another handful of Raisinets in my mouth. What gets me is the 'pretty face' bit. 'Cause I won't mind being reminded I'm fat as long as you water it down first. Why not say, Hey I'm going to insult you, but first I will congratulate your fortunate genetics and appropriate appliclation of Bobbi Brown cosmetics to prevent you from hitting me. Sh*t; I kind of prefer being called a 'fat bitch.' At least it doesn't pull any punches.

I would rather receive a Pap smear from Captain Hook than venture out on New Year's Eve.

The next time a challenging situation presents itself, take a pause and make the conscious choice to meet it with curiosity or humor or the knowledge that this too shall pass.

Don't sleep with your drummer. Dumb-ass.

I realize I'm making it sound like we're all crazy, but that's because we kind of are.

Talk to strangers, we're all family on this planet. • Expect, and enjoy, the unexpected. • Find the humor. • Join the party. • Live in the moment. • Time spent enjoying yourself is never time wasted. • Share your space.

The difference between seeing someone fall apart laughing and seeing them fall apart laughing at something you said. The first usually makes you feel as good and laugh as hard as they do, which raises your frequency. The second situation, you're not just meeting them at a high frequency, you're exchanging energy at a high frequency.

The testosterone-fueled chip on my shoulder came from a high school career spent futilely awaiting a timely puberty while standing a good foot taller than everyone on earth, all the boys at my high school included. None of them ever asked me out, but I could make them laugh and kick their asses at basketball, so rather than fail at seducing them, I simply became one of them.

Men are so cheap these days. Whatever happened to guys bringing women chocolates or flowers? I've reached the point where the grim reaper could show up at my door and I'd be like, "Oh my God, you brought me a scythe. That's so sweet!"

This is nice," Dylanna commented. "Almost like old times," Kamarie said. "Almost," Oraeyn chuckled, "except we're not outside in that rain. We're not hungry, wet, cold, or lost, and there are no enemies chasing us. Except for that, it's exactly like old times!" Kamarie chuckled. "You left out being terrified out of our minds.

Laugh at yourself, high and mighty king, laugh at yourself or despair!

Thou may leave the toilet seat up. But thou shalt not leave the toilet seat down and pee on it.

Uh, you're going to take off your clothes?" she asked. He gave her a grin. "Well, I normally don't sleep in my full regalia." "What do you sleep in?" He couldn't resist. "Nothing.

Love," as he now conceived of it, involved "slow growth, many slowly formed bonds, tests by vicissitudes as well as pleasure, mutual sharing of esthetic experiences, humor, sensory things from food through music to passion, etc." Any truly lasting relationship, he concluded would necessitate "a lengthy apprenticeship.

People laugh at me. Sometimes I know why, and sometimes I don't. But I can pretty much find humor in anything. That is a necessary part of life. I don't want to say laughter is healing, because it sounds corny, but it's a release.

Life can be dramatic and funny all in the same day.

My hair has never been my greatest feature, so that was funny enough unto itself that my hair became so focused on.