Quotes About Humor

How many software developers does it take to change a lightbulb? None, it's a hardware problem.

M.J. looked at her. What's the difference between God and a federal judge? I don't know. God doesn't think he's a federal judge. Tara smiled, for what seemed like the first time in days.

She heard pa shouting,Jiminy crickets!It's raining fish-hooks and hammer handles!

Grace sat up, too frightened to make a sound, and even Laura was horrified, for the stool lay in two pieces. Then Pa laughed. "Never mind, Grace," he said. "You only unscrewed it all the way. But," he said sternly, "you stay off this stool, after this.

Ma didn't think puns were funny but couldn't help laughing at the naughty look Pa gave her when he made one.

The silvery aura from the window fell across his face, lighting a translucent, pale fire in his gray eyes. She could identify no telltale trace of humor or mockery in his features. There was simply his austere male beauty, that sullen perfection marred only by the little scar across his left eyebrow, which showed more clearly in the thin winter light.

Ronnie indossava calzoncini porpora e una T-shirt che diceva: AL DI FUORI DEL CANE, IL LIBRO è IL MIGLIOR AMICO DELL'UOMO. DENTRO IL CANE, è TROPPO BUIO PER LEGGERE.

His eyes widened just a bit, his lips flexed. I realized he was trying not to laugh. I hate it when people find my threats amusing.

The ratman froze, staring at me. Why are you laughing? His voice held just a hint of unease. Good. I was hoping that the vampires would come for me soon and save me. You've got to admit that's funny.

Surely being in love doesn't cause you to lose your sense of good taste. If I ever buy a gown with sequins on it, someone just shoot me.

You don't smoke do you? No, why? They're afraid of fire. Great, we're going to be eaten alive because neither of us smokes. I almost laughed. He sounded so thoroughly disgusted…

I wasn't crying, my eyes were running. My eyes were running because there were pieces of zombies all over my toys. Jesus.

Who would have ever thought I'd be afraid of a zombie, any kind of zombie? Nicely ironic that.

I thought of several alec smart remarks, but you should humor crazy people when you're at their mercy; it's a rule.

If I let you get killed, the other bodyguards will make fun of me.

Anita can speak for herself, Richard said. Jean-Claude's attention flicked back to me. That is certainly true. But I came to see how the two of you enjoyed the play. And pigs fly, I said. You don't believe me? Not hardly, I said.

You look like shit. Jason smiled, without opening his eyes. You sweet-talker.

You should hit him in the face with frying pans more often, Said Rhys he seems to like it

Edward: I don't know whether to put my fingers in my ears and go la-la-la or find more of your guards so we can take bets.

You just wanted to walk in front of me so I'd have to stare at your butt

At least I'm not dead. That can be remedied. Jean-Claude & Richard

I thought about it for another minute, and then said, "Okay." "Now that's an okay that really means okay, not that okay that women use when it means everything but okay." I had to laugh then, because he was absolutely right.

Please, I always use fresh sarcasm, never canned.

I enjoy killing people with you. Could that count as a date?" I shook my head. "No, nothing illegal counts." He sighed. "Dating is harder than I thought it would be." "Always," I said.