Quotes About Humor

I would be the worst biologist in the world!

I used to picture myself as the old guy eating the Early Bird Specials in the mall.

I was affectionately known as Bird Legs during high school.

It's funny. I did give birth to an alien on 'The X-Files.' And it's just the teaser, so I'm dead before we even get into the episode.

My best birth control now is just to leave the lights on.

I feel like I'm edgy and I'm funny and I got this bite, this outrageousness.

Coming up with comedy is hard, man. Those bits aren't easy to think of!

I tell the audience bits of my rude life on stage so they don't mind telling me bits of theirs.

I love playing the bitter guy.

Of course, it's fun to play with Blacks.

I always say to Blake Griffin that he has a better comedy career than I do.

I am not a farceur. I am not Blake Edwards.

Comedy can be fun no matter what you're playing. It always has the potential to be a blast.

You can make bleak things funny but if you're glib about it, it doesn't work.

With comedy, it's not always a blessing to be beautiful because part of it is self-parody and gurning.

People often ask what I think of Michael McIntyre. I think he's funny. He's a nice bloke.

Ditzy dumb blonde? I can be ditzy. I can be.

I think as a blonde person with make-up on, you're automatically the punchline to the joke.

I mean, I find drama to be engaging and it makes your blood pressure go up and you keep watching, but it's not as entertaining as, say, comedy.

I'd rather eat a cow-pat on a bun than a bloody McDonalds.

Australian bands are so self-deprecating - then they go on stage and blow every other band off the stage.

If a song about blowing your shot becomes popular, that's really funny.

I'm always blown away by stand-ups. I'm blown away by people like that who are craftspeople at comedy.

Yes, I believe blue material is funny, but if that's all you've got, you're dead in the water. It's not good.