Quotes About Humor

I was attacked? I thought I just ran into a tree." "Aye, ye did," he acknowledged. "But when yer squawking woke me up, someone was chasing ye." "Squawking?" she asked with affront. "I do not squawk, husband." His mouth worked briefly and he turned away for another pseudo cough, but then nodded solemnly. "I meant scream. When yer screaming woke me up." "Hmmm

Amusing a woman too much is as good as courting her, and as much as I enjoyed her company I wasn't quite sure I was ready for more than that.

but personally if I never drink another crocodile pee I shall be a happy man.' 'Crocodile pee?' 'I always assumed that that was the main ingredient in Gatorade, but I may be wrong.

I want to be able to hump people's legs and have them do nothing about it.

Don't forget to be silly, don't forget to take something away from this whole experience, and don't forget to stick something up your sleeve.

He sucked the chicken wing philosophically.

Aos quinze anos, há até certa graça em ameaçar muito e não executar nada.

A ferocidade, Sr. Soares, é o grotesco a sério.

Tio Cosme respondeu com um Ora! que, traduzido em vulgar, queria dizer: São imaginações do José Dias; os pequenos divertem-se, eu divirto-me; onde está o gamão?

A good laugh heals a lot of hurts.

If I sit for a while, then my impatience, crossness, frustration, are indeed annihilated, and my sense of humor returns.

Mother says she can never stay mad at Daddy no matter how hard she tries. And Daddy says, ' Stay mad! You won't even let me get mad at you,' and then they laugh. Aren't you sorry for people who don't laugh, Vicky? Yes. And people who don't love music and books. And people, John said.

And we mustn't lose our sense of humor, Mrs. Which said. The only way to cope with something deadly serious is to try to treat it a little lightly.

Ach,' she heard someone saying, 'I left mein ceinture dans le shower ce morgen. Quelle dope ich bin!

Thee onnlly wway ttoo ccope withh ssometthingg ddeadly sseriouss iss ttoo ttry ttoo trreatt itt a llittlle lligghtly.

Why do lawyers never get bitten by snakes?" "I give up. Why do lawyers never get bitten by snakes?" "Professional courtesy.

If you have some liniment I'll put it on my dignity

I was just laughing because I felt good. You act as though you keep expecting people to laugh at you. You ought to just laugh at them. I'll bet they're funnier than you are.

Anything else, Your Majesty? I didn't say my prayers. I'll say them for you. Our father who art in et cetera, bless all the rotten cousins and kill Jenny. Amen.

If I fall down the stairs," she added in a low dry voice, "and end up sprawled at the bottom in front of all those swells, I'm going to pretend that I'm dead. You tell someone to haul me off to the nearest boardinghouse, then go have your supper.

Hee-hee-hee-who," she breathed, only she managed to do it to the tune of Beethoven's Fifth, and Caleb burst out laughing.

Why is it that married people always say Come in when everything they do says Get out? They talk about their miseries and then ask you why you're unmarried.

You know, in order to make somebody laugh, you have to be interesting, and in order to be interesting, you have to do things that are mean. Comedy comes out of anger, and interesting comes out of angry; otherwise there is no conflict. But he was able to be mean and you forgave him, and you have to be able to forgive somebody, because at the end of the day, you still have to be with him, even after he's dumped the girl or made some choices that you don't agree with.

In order to make somebody laugh, you have to be interesting, and in order to be interesting, you have to do things that are mean. Comedy comes out of anger, and interesting comes out of angry; otherwise there is no conflict.