Quotes About Humor

Good. Now, I want everyone to stand very still and close their eyes. Who is snoring? Scorchpaw, that's not nearly as funny as you think it is. Only horses sleep standing up, and if you'd like to go live with them and eat grass all day, I'm sure Blackstar can arrange it.

Sandstorm shot Fireheart a wry look.

Anyway," he went on after a moment, sounding more relaxed, "the first time I went hunting with Firestar, I really wanted to impress him. I ran so hard after a squirrel that I slipped on some wet leaves, went nose over paws, and crashed into a tree. Great StarClan, it hurt! And what hurt even more was that I was pretty sure Firestar had to stop himself from laughing." "Really?

Whoa, who peed in your Cheerios?

Every time you strip my sword, I owe you a kiss. How's that sound?" I bit my lip to keep from giggling. "That sounds really dirty." Patch waggled his brows. "Look whose mind just rolled into the gutter.

I'm going to grab a cheeseburger," I told Patch. Want anything?" Nothing on the menu." I smiled. Why, Patch, are you flirting with me?

Yes, yes, it's the most comical thing in the world. And we laugh, we laugh, with a will, in the beginning. But it's always the same thing. Yes, it's like the funny story we have heard too often, we still find it funny, but we don't laugh any more.

Life is a joke. The only way to survive it is to find the right punchline.

If you cannot get your act together then at least try to make it entertaining." Becky Johnson

Mirth is God's medicine. Everybody ought to bathe in it.

Life is full of amusement to an amusing man.

Has the gift of laughter been withdrawn from me? I protest that I do still, at the age of forty-seven, laugh often and loud and long. But not, I believe, so long and loud and often as in my less smiling youth. And I am proud, nowadays, of laughing, and grateful to any one who makes me laugh. That is a bad sign. I no longer take laughter as a matter of course.

Only the insane take themselves quite seriously.

Styeddy, styeddy. Boyfrriend. Boyfrriends out eleven o'clock, styeddies out twelve," she pronounced sternly. Then, as if relieved at an unpleasant duty so neatly discharged, she added: "Rrule." Beguiled by the momentary vision of a procession of boyfriends tiptoeing down the stairs, shoes in hand, while steadies, single-file, marched up from eleven to twelve, I said primly: "I'm interested only in my work.

He did as I asked and then starting walking toward the door. "Yell when you're ready." "Can you please grab my phone too? It's in the kitchen." He nodded and left me. Interesting. I wasn't used to being waited on hand and foot. Hmm, perhaps every woman could do with a male helper. With benefits, or course.

In June, 1864, a Texan summed up with striking aptness the Rebel clothing situation. "In this army," he wrote from near Atlanta, "one hole in the seat of the breeches indicates a captain, two holes a lieutenant, and the seat of the pants all out indicates that the individual is a private.

You look good scruffy." "Now that I know you think that, I'll never shave again." She laughed again. "Remind me to look you up in two years to see how long your beard is." "All you'll have to do is roll over in our bed to see that.

I'm Chloe." Chase was more than a little surprised by how amused she was by the whole thing. Clearly, she was enjoying watching him deal with this predicament. Which was, he suddenly had to admit, pretty funny. "Chase picked me up tonight." She nodded in his direction and added, "You know the story—girl in trouble on the side of the road meets guy in a flashy car.

smartass like him.

What do you call frozen dog poo?

I shoot the Hippopotamus With bullets made of platinum, Because if I use leaden ones His hide is sure to flatten 'em.

My dad was a fairy," said Zach. "And by that I don't mean he dressed well and enjoyed musical theatre.

Don't ask me why I know what an Edwardian smoking jacket looks like: let's just say it has something to do with Doctor Who and leave it at that.

Zap,' I said. 'That's the technical term for it, is it? What do you call someone who's been zapped?' 'Mr. Crispy,' said Kumar.