Quotes About Humor

What's that?" he yelped. "Don't worry," said Ford, "they haven't started yet." "Thank God for that," said Arthur, and relaxed. "It's probably just your house being knocked down

Hey, you sass that hoopy Ford Prefect? There's a frood who really knows where his towel is.

There was once a point to this story, but it has temporarily escaped the chronicler's mind.

Orbiting this at a distance of roughly ninety-eight million miles is an utterly insignificant little blue-green planet whose ape-descended life forms are so amazingly primitive that they still think digital watches are a pretty neat idea.

Life! Don't talk to me about life!

They were a double pair of Joo Janta 200 Super-Chromatic Peril Sensitive Sunglasses, which had been specially designed to help people develop a relaxed attitude to danger. At the first hint of trouble they turn totally black and thus prevent you from seeing anything that might alarm you.

This bowl was brought to you by the Campaign to Save the Humans. We bid you farewell." And then the sound of long, heavy, perfectly gray bodies rolling away into an unknown fathomless deep, quietly giggling.

Tief im Regenwald tat es das, was es im Regenwald normalerweise tut, nämlich regnen: daher der Name.

Listen, Ford," said Zaphod, "everything's cool and froody." "You mean everything's under control." "No," said Zaphod, "I do not mean everything's under control. That would not be cool and froody.

In fact I wanted to be John Cleese and it took me some time to realise that the job was in fact taken." At

You will need to know the difference between Friday and a fried egg. It's quite a simple difference, but an important one. Friday comes at the end of the week, whereas a fried egg comes out of a hen. Like most things, of course, it isn't quite that simple.

Ah, thank you,' said Ford. He and Arthur took their jynnan tonnyx. Arthur sipped his, and was surprised to discover it tasted very like a whisky and soda.

He almost danced to the fridge, found the three least hairy things in it, put them on a plate and watched them intently for two minutes. Since they made no attempt to move within that time he called them breakfast and ate them.

The man who invented the Total Perspective Vortex did so basically in order to annoy his wife. Trin Tragula – for that was his name – was a dreamer, a thinker, a speculative philosopher or, as his wife would have it, an idiot.

computer chattered to itself in alarm as it noticed an airlock open and close itself for no apparent reason. This was because reason was in fact out to lunch.

Science has achieved some wonderful things, of course, but I'd far rather be happy than right any day.' 'And are you?' 'No. That's where it all falls down, of course.' 'Pity,' said Arthur with sympathy. 'It sounded like quite a good lifestyle otherwise.

Well, that was another thing that hadn't changed. Some people pick their noses, others habitually beat up old ladies on the streets.

Slartibartfast's study was a total mess, like the results of an explosion in a public library.

The arkleseizure cometh!

Simple. I got very bored and depressed, so I went and plugged myself in to its external computer feed. I talked to the computer at great length and explained my view of the Universe to it," said Marvin. "And what happened?" pressed Ford. "It committed suicide," said Marvin, and stalked off back to the Heart of Gold.

It is most gratifying that your enthusiasm for our planet continues unabated. As a token of our appreciation, we hope you will enjoy the two thermonuclear missiles we've just sent to converge with your craft. To ensure ongoing quality of service, your death may be monitored for training purposes. Thank you.

I'm so hip I have difficulty seeing over my pelvis

If I asked you where the hell we were,' said Arthur weakly, 'would I regret it?' Ford stood up. 'We're safe,' he said. 'Oh good,' said Arthur. 'We're in a small galley cabin,' said Ford, 'in one of the spaceships of the Vogon Constructor Fleet.' 'Ah,' said Arthur, 'this is obviously some strange usage of the word safe that I wasn't previously aware of.

En este punto vale la pena recordar las teorías a las que había llegado Ford en su primer encuentro con los seres humanos para explicar su extraña costumbre de afirmar y reafirmar de continuo lo claro y evidente, como «Hace buen día», «Es usted muy alto», o «Así que ya está, vamos a morir».