Quotes About Humor

Weil ich keinen Bock habe, in einen übergewichtigen Kerl verknallt zu sein, der Chuck heißt und in irgendeinem Vorort von Detroit bei seiner Mutter im Keller lebt.

He chuckled softly. I wanted to sock him in the face.

Nejsem z reality zrovna na vÄ›tvi, ale je to poÃ…â"¢ád jediné místo, kde dostanete sluÅ¡né jídlo. (Groucho Marx)

Pee-wee Herman yelling through a vocoder

You could shove it up your ass and pretend you're a corn dog.

I stopped moving forward and the sound of hoofbeats also ceased, but not until a few seconds later. I turned around and saw the source of the sound. It wasn't a horse. It was a man banging two coconut halves together.

Great, Wade, I thought. You just called her laugh "dorky." Real smooth.

All of them have tentacles, like their mother! The youngest one in curls!" Diehl laughed. Cruz laughed. I laughed.

I studied Monty Python. And not just Holy Grail, either. Every single one of their films, albums, and books, and every episode of the original BBC series. (Including those two "lost" episodes they did for German television.)

A man's got to take a lot of punishment to write a really funny book.

if you're dealing with monkeys, you got to expect some wrenches.....

An acceptable proportion must be maintained whether in a novel, therapy or everyday life — between pain and other aspects of living. Humor, irony, diversity of interests, a sense of adventure, mystery, love — all are story elements passed over by those people who are most imprisoned within their pain. Such persons can be only temporarily interesting, either in a novel or in life itself.

My cell rings. I answer it without looking at the caller ID. "Hannah, I'm sorry." My voice is a moan. "It's Ryan, actually.'' "Oh. Hey, Ryan." I grin. "What'd you do to Hannah?" I try to be evasive. "What are you talking about?" "Uh-huh. Good try. What did you do?" "She'll thank me for it one day." "Oh man! It was that bad?" "Will you relax? It is not bad." "Is? Present tense? It's still going on?" "Calm down, Ryan!" "I have known you too long, Laurie Holbrook, to relax.

My mouth is full of Oreo, ice cream, fudge, and Cool Whip, so I just nod. This is heaven. I'm moving into one of their guest rooms. So, Laur, do you want to come with us tomorrow? You can help me plan out furniture while Nick and Ryan dig for grubs,' she says, licking her fork. Can we keep the rest of this dessert?" She grins. 'Sure.' Then I'll come.' She watches me put another bite in my mouth and close my eyes.'You're pitiful.' No, just a chocoholic.' She shakes her head. 'Same thing.

Jack's height comes from his mom. She has one of those weird "I'm taller than my husband" things going on. I find it weird anyway. Probably because I'm five foot two, and in order to marry someone shorter than me, I'd have to start searching the ranks of little people.

Ice cream is probably healthier than most breakfast cereals. I'm looking at you, Froot Loops.

Tell me bout this caveman with the clam moustache been barkin speeches all over Germany.

Today, I made a log of farts.

Well I am not sure about the secret to long life but I can tell you I met a teacher called Meekin a short time back he whispered something to me that made me laugh so hard I wet myself. I recommend everyone wet themselves with laughter once in their life."

Say,' Uzi pressed on, 'is it true that when you people go out on a job they promise you seventy nymphomaniac virgins in Kingdom Come? All for you, Solico?' 'Sure, they promise,' Nassar said, 'and look what it got me. Lukewarm vodka.' 'So you're just a sucker in the end, eh, ya Nasser,' Uzi gloated. 'Sure thing,' Nasser nodded. 'And you, what did they promise you?

There is nothing that will make an Englishman shit so quick as the sight of General Washington.

Every time he opens his mouth I have absolutely no idea what he's gonna say. He's the most honest person I've ever met. He's a quick study and rarely needs to make the same mistake twice. He really tries to learn, and does, and he makes me laugh, and the world's generally a lighter place when he's in my sight.

DISCIPLINE DOESN'T MEAN LIMITING your freedom. It's the impetus for developing a structure to your activity, which comes from taking deadly seriously—with a strong sense of humor—the truth of interdependence.

You grow up the day you have your first real laugh at yourself.