Quotes About Wit

My main point is to be funny; if I can slip a message in there, fine.

I have more in common with a three-toed sloth or a one-eyed pterodactyl or a Kalamata olive than I have with Winston Churchill.

People probably perceive me as a bit boring because I am a little slow in the humor department, but it's just hard for me to get jokes when they're told in English. I am always the last one to get it.

A good pun may be admitted among the smaller excellencies of lively conversation.

I like smart jokes, I like dumb jokes, and I like dumb jokes done smartly.

Audiences are always better pleased with a smart retort, some joke or epigram, than with any amount of reasoning.

You're not too smart, are you? I like that in a man.

I love playing a smart person and not that blonde deadpan.

I've never progressed very far from my days as a smart aleck in middle school.

I think people are sexy when they have a sense of humor, when they are smart, when they have some sense of style, when they are kind, when they express their own opinions, when they are creative, when they have character.

I think to be a successful comic, you have to be exceptionally smart and exceptionally perceptive.

I'm smart and I can be really funny and interesting and I can go toe-to-toe with anybody in a conversation.

You know, I think British comedy is very smart comedy. You don't get too much dumb comedy over here. Or at least I haven't seen it. If I'm wrong about that, I apologize to all the dumb comedy makers over here.

I like to think I'm a bit smarter than I sometimes let on.

Oscar Wilde: 'Do you mind if I smoke?' Sarah Bernhardt: 'I don't care if you burn.'

As a guest who doesn't eat, drink or smoke, you leave much to be desired, but as a writer, you're my girl.

I like to keep a bottle of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy.

I just am a snob when it comes to humor.

I'm a comedy snob, and I never want anything that I do to get old.

I always wanted to do Restoration comedy. It seems like so much fun.

That is why Bias jested with those who were going through the perils of a great storm with him and calling on the gods for help: Shut up, he said, so that they do not realize that you are here with me.

I love to discourse and dispute, but it is with but few men, and for myself; for to do it as a spectacle and entertainment to great persons, and to make of a man's wit and words competitive parade is, in my opinion, very unbecoming a man of honor.

the property of Man's wit to act readily and quickly, while the property of the judgement is to be slow and poised.

Tis my humor as much to regard the form as the substance, and the advocate as much as the cause, as Alcibiades ordered we should: and every day pass away my time in reading authors without any consideration of their learning; their manner is what I look after, not their subject. And just so do I hunt after the conversation of any eminent wit, not that he may teach me, but that I may know him, and that knowing him, if I think him worthy of imitation, I may imitate him.