Quotes About Wit

She has such a nice sense of rumor.

He writes so well he makes me feel like putting my quill back in my goose.

Defining and analyzing humor is a pastime of humorless people.

Well, just being stupid and politically incorrect doesn't work. You can be politically incorrect if you're smart.

If you want to be witty, work on your character and say what you think on every occasion.

I looked at him. "You really need to work on your threats. I can't tell if you're threatening me or inviting me for tea.

I've always got stuff in my head in case I meet somebody like Steven Spielberg or someone like that, where I can hopefully say something to them that nobody else has ever said and get a laugh out of them.

And I have to say, for the record, my favorite line from 'Without A Clue' is after Michael Caine pokes a dead body with a stick and announces to everyone, 'It is my opinion that this man is dead.'

I see you're a man with ideals. I better be going before you've still got them.

If something stinks, I say it stinks. But I try to massage it a little and not be as cutting, come behind it with a joke: Hey, I cut you deep, but now let me put a couple of stitches in you.

I'm a plethora of stolen jokes and kitschy references.

A good painting is a lot like a good joke: you need to know when to stop, too many 'punchlines and you will have gone too far.

I'm a sarcastic, observational storyteller.

I have to have people around who are of a certain strain of humour. I can't deal with people who have no humour.

My dad is a very quick-witted, sarcastic, dry, humorous guy, whereas my mom's very silly, and that side of the family is very musical.

Most of my ideas just come out funny.

Puns are the E. coli of humor,

Benson, you are so free of the ravages of intelligence

I like to crack the jokes now and again, but it's only because I struggle with math.

They share the same ballbusting sense of humor, both of them from a generation that seemed to know how to do two things far better than my contemporaries: work and laugh.

I think I was born with a natural way of looking at something and trying to find the ways in which it was odd or funny, Even in the sad or angry stuff, I was, 'Well, but where is the funny part of this?'

The odd things that people say to you are so much more hilarious than what you can come up with.

My secret to comedy is don't offend anybody. Don't offend anybody ever. That's my secret.

With my humor, I end up offending everybody!