Quotes About Perspective

Pride is all very well, but a sausage is a sausage.

Sometimes the only answer to death is lunch.

The things we laugh at are awful while they are going on, but get funny when we look back. And other people laugh because they've been through it too. The closest thing to humor is tragedy.

You can only be young once. But you can always be immature.

When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say?

I'm not completely sure we aren't all living in a hallucination now.

Bad humor is an evasion of reality; good humor is an acceptance of it.

If it's a penny for your thoughts and you put in your two cents worth, then someone, somewhere is making a penny.

Everyone looks retarded once you set your mind to it.

I used to do drugs. I still do drugs. But I used to, too.

Old age is fifteen years older than I am.

Humor is unavoidable. It might not feel funny in the moment, but more often than not there's a light at the end of the tunnel.

To my mind, a well-developed sense of humor is the surest indication of a person's humanity, no matter how black and bitter that humor may be.

A hooker once told me she had a headache.

As we look for humor, seek for the eternal perspective, understnd the principle of compensation, and draw near to our Heavenly Father, we can endure heardship and trial.

Humor [in a scene] is not jokes. It is that attitude toward being alive without which you would long ago have jumped off the 59th Street Bridge.

Every time I go and shave, I assume there's someone else on the planet shaving. So I say, 'I'm gonna go shave, too.'

I used to be scared of pretty girls, until one confessed they're just as scared of me.

Housework can kill you if done right.

Beauty is all very well at first sight; but who ever looks at it when it has been in the house three days?

A sense of humor judges one's actions and the actions of others from a wider reference. It pardons shortcomings, it consoles failure.

But I think frustration is hilarious. One of my missions is to bring humor into fine art. It's sacred.

Doctor told me I've got two weeks to live. I said: "Can I have the last week in July and the 1st week in August?"

Sometimes I... No, I don't.