Quotes About Perception

In my house on the ceilings I have paintings of the rooms above... so I never have to go upstairs.

The funniest thing about some people is that they have no sense of humor.

Ivory's the kind of girl who gets drunk and immediately starts slurring. I have a lot of friends like that, and I think it's because it makes me look 'more together.

I think God, in creating man, somewhat overestimated his ability.

Tell people there's an invisible man in the sky who created the universe, and the vast majority will believe you. Tell them the paint is wet, and they have to touch it to be sure.

I'm not a psychopath, I'm a high-functioning sociopath. Do your research.

Sun is bad for you. Everything our parents said was good is bad. Sun, milk, red meat...college,

I wasn't shy, but I was really hyper. Nobody got my sense of humor. I was a black skater kid.

This explains why, whenever a person says sie to me, I generally try to kill him, if a stranger.

You stupid piece of warm bacon.

Life is like a double-blind experiment. And the Observer is the only One in on the Know.

I keep telling myself sensible things, but I never seem to listen!

Wisdom of the Ages: "Tooth Fairy" Growing up in the Northwest was tough. For years I thought the Tooth Fairy was a big boat with cars and sharp teeth.

98% of all comedians feel obliged to be funny when interviewed. Less than 2% succeed.

If it was appropriate to judge a person based on her footwear - and it obviously was - I decided I liked her immediately.

I realized everyone around me was wearing a uniform. Black pants, white button-down shirts, green ties. Gotta love the smell of institutional equality in the morning.

What time is it?""One o'clock."I nearly spit out some soda. "In theafternoon?""No. In the morning. Don't let that damnsunlight fool you. It lies.

When I was a wee little kid, " remarked Roic, watching over their shoulders, "there was a time I thought that any skinny old man I saw was my grandfather. It was pretty confusing.

Ah, Proph." Tom paused. "You did have a nightmare last night.""And here I thought maybe I dreamed it, " Prophet muttered sarcastically.

I wondered what he would have thought if he'd known that I'd gleaned most of my information from reading historical romance novels.

Oh, hey, kettle, I'm pot and wow, you're black." - Owen

The thing I like about Irish whiskey is that the more you drink the smoother it goes down. Of course that's probably true of antifreeze as well, but illusion is nearly all we have.

REFUSALWhen you refuseto tell your weightand age, people knowyou're fat and old.

Zane raised his brow. "Didn't I say that yesterday?" he asked, forcinghimself to be patient. Somehow."You say that like you think I listen to you, " Ty responded instantly, asmile pulling at his lips.