Quotes About Sarcasm

But now that you mention it, will you promise to off me when I'm ninety and never leave home without an oxygen tank? Make a day of it. Just roll me and my wheelchair off the George Washington Bridge and call it a life. Deal? The request seemed to make her smile. Deal. They should really tack that on to the marriage ceremony. 'Do you promise to love, honor, obey me, and also to kill me when I can no longer stand in a shower?'?

A mama's boy, loner, intellectual, voracious reader and gourmand, Dimitri was a man of esoteric skills and appetites: a gambler, philosopher, gardener, fly-fisherman, fluent in Russian and German as well as having an amazing command of English. He loved antiquated phrases, dry sarcasm, military jargon, regional dialect, and the New York Times crossword puzzle — to which he was hopelessly addicted.

Rick Rubin and I had been talking about sarcasm a lot. Rick had read a theory that it was an incredibly detrimental form of humor that depresses the spirit of its proponents.

She simply chose to have some one sitting with her to whom she could speak and make little cross-grained, sarcastic, and ill-natured remarks.

Wit is educated insolence.

They are fond of fun and therefore witty, wit being well-bred insolence.

You're going to throw me naked into a pit and make me drench myself in baby lotion, aren't you? Bride You live in New Orleans, where they can't even dig a grave. So tell me where I'm going to find this pit? Vane It's an above ground pit. Bride Hardly secretive. Vane But possible, Bride

I' m going to bed. If anyone else attacks tonight, feed them Nick and tell them to go away. -Caleb

Got it. You're fourteen. I'm proud you can count that high. It's a testament to the modern American education system. But I should probable point out that you're not the only one. I'm told you go to a school with a whole class of-get this-kids who are fourteen.- Ash

Across the room, Nia said with a smirk, "Look at Tinkerbell going all mama-bear." Hope snapped, "Oh, shove the Tinkerbell crap up your ass." For about two seconds, Nia just stared at her. Then she started to laugh.

I've been drinking goat's milk and went to see the doctor. Quite a living they make from me, the doctors! They should all drop dead and take the pharmacist with them.

A substantial daily intake of alcohol was the perfect way to stay in shape.

Nothing is so fatiguing as the life of a wit.

Fair enough…No inhaling battery acid, " I smirk. "We can't breathe batteryacid, can we?

Stuffed deer heads on walls are bad enough, but it's worse when you see them wearing dark glasses, having streamers around their necks and a hat on their antlers. Because then you know they were enjoying themselves at a party when they were shot.

Oh, I said 'I'm so happy, I could die.' She said 'Drop dead,' then left with another guy.

Don't get smart or sarcastic He snaps back just like elastic Spare us the theatrics and the verbal gymnastics We break wise guys just like matchsticks

Anyone may now and then have the sense of occupying only a point and a moment; to have such a sense day and night, hour by hour, is less frequent, and it is from this experience, this datum, that one turns toward nirvana or sarcasm--or toward both at once.

It is not misfortune but happiness—insolent happiness, it is true—which leads to rancor and sarcasm.

With Ricky Gervais, it's all shades of wrong, it's my kind of humor.

My whole family is very sarcastic and constantly making jokes.

Sarcasm is the language of the devil.

Satire is a wrapping of exaggeration around a core of reality.

Colombian humor is very black, very sarcastic.