Quotes from Kerry Patterson

People who are skilled at dialogue do their best to make it safe for everyone to add their meaning to the shared pool--even ideas that at first glance appear controversial, wrong, or at odds with their own beliefs. Now, obviously they don't agree with every idea; they simply do their best to ensure that all ideas find their way into the open.

It's the most talented, not the least talented, who are continually trying to improve their dialogue skills. As is often the case, the rich get richer.

As much as others may need to change, or we may want them to change, the only person we can continually inspire, prod, and shape—with any degree of success—is the person in the mirror.

Goals without deadlines aren't goals; they're merely directions.

The key to real change lies not in implementing a new process, but in getting people to hold one another accountable to the process.

Remember, to know and not to do is really not to know.

At the core of every successful conversation lies the free flow of relevant information.

One of the best ways to persuade others is with your ears—by listening to them. —DEAN RUSK

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret. —AMBROSE BIERCE

Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter. —MARTIN LUTHER KING JR. Mastering

The mistake most of us make in our crucial conversations is we believe that we have to choose between telling the truth and keeping a friend.

You know what? We need to talk about this. I'm glad you asked the question. Thank you for taking that risk. I appreciate the trust it shows in me.

Don't aim for perfection. Aim for progress. Learn to slow the process down when your adrenaline gets pumping.

What do I really want for myself? What do I really want for others? What do I really want for the relationship?

Influencers use four tactics to help people love what they hate: 1. Allow for choice. 2. Create direct experiences. 3. Tell meaningful stories. 4. Make it a game.

At the end of the day, what qualifies people to be called "leaders" is their capacity to influence others to change their behavior in order to achieve important results.

An apology is a statement that sincerely expresses your sorrow for your role in causing—or at least not preventing—pain or difficulty to others.

practice doesn't make perfect; perfect practice makes perfect.

When people purposefully withhold meaning from one another, individually smart people can do collectively stupid things.

A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in baskets of silver.

Nothing fails like success. In other words, when a challenge in life is met by a response that is equal to it, you have success. But when the challenge moves to a higher level, the old, once successful response no longer works—it fails; thus, nothing fails like success.

There are four common ways of making decisions: command, consult, vote, and consensus. These four options represent increasing degrees of involvement.

Nothing in this world is good or bad, but thinking makes it so. —WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE

When it comes to risky, controversial, and emotional conversations, skilled people find a way to get all relevant information (from themselves and others) out into the open.