Quotes from Bruce D. Perry

This is where the work begins—the work to excavate the roots that were put down long before we had the words to articulate what was happening to us.

We don't begin our lives by asking: Am I enough? Am I worthy? Am I deserving or lovable?

sensory experiences that last mere seconds or are endured for years can remain locked deep in the brain. Yet as our brains develop, constantly absorbing new experiences while continuing to make sense of the world around us, every moment builds upon all the moments that came before.

the earliest experiences have the biggest impact because that is when the brain is most rapidly growing.

Over the years, I've found that seemingly senseless behavior makes sense once you look at what is behind it. And since the brain is the part of us that allows us to think, feel, and act, whenever I'm trying

There was no time for nurturing. I was always trying not to bother her or worry her. My mother felt distant, cold to the needs of this little girl. All of the energy went to keeping her head above water, surviving. I always felt like a burden, an "extra mouth to feed." I rarely remember feeling loved. From as early as I can remember, I knew I was on my own.

And you can go to places in your head and imagine things in the future in ways that a lot of people have a hard time doing. That's dissociation. It's healthy, healing, and productive. That is why people need to be careful about labeling dissociation as a pathology, as strictly negative behavior. It can also be an incredible strength.

to understand someone, I wonder about that person's brain. Why did they do that? What would make them act that way? Something happened that influenced how their brain works.

All experience is processed from the bottom up, meaning, to get

to the top, "smart" part of our brain, we have to go through the lower, not-so-smart part. This sequential processing means that the most primitive, reactive part of our brain is the first part to interpret and act on the information coming in from our senses. Bottom line: Our brain is organized to act and feel before we think.

The struggles I endured as a child are what allowed me to recognize and care about pain in others. The validation I longed for as a child is what I see other people longing for just as intensely. Thousands of people had the courage to share their stories with me because their story was my story. Their pain was my pain. Because all pain is the same. — Oprah

Starting in the womb, the developing brain begins to store parts of our life experience. Fetal brain development can be influenced by a host of factors including mother's stress; drug, alcohol, and nicotine intake; diet; and patterns of activity.

we tend to see children who are whiny and demanding and aggressive as "spoiled" and "indulged," rather than recognizing that these qualities usually arise from unmet needs and unexplored potential, not from having too much or feeling too good.

through the lower, not-so-smart part. This sequential processing means that the most primitive, reactive part of our brain is the first part to interpret and act on the information coming in from our senses. Bottom line: Our brain is organized to act and feel before we think.

This is essential to understand if you're a teacher, because while the regulated child can learn, the dysregulated child will not.

Certainly, our work supports that observation. One of our major findings is that in determining someone's current mental health, the history of their childhood relational health—their connectedness—is as important as, if not more important than, their history of adversity.

Cuantas más relaciones saludables tiene un niño, mayores probabilidades habrá de que se recupere de un trauma y crezca sano. Las relaciones son los agentes de cambio, y la terapia más poderosa es el amor humano.

labor asistencial como las investigaciones sugieren que las experiencias de curación más importantes en la vida de los niños traumatizados no suceden en la propia terapia.

The attentive, loving behaviors grow the neural networks that allow us to feel love, and then act in loving ways toward others. If you are loved, you learn to love. Caring for the infant in this loving way also changes the brain of the caregiving adult. These interactions regulate and reward both child and caregiver.

groomed to be compliant, confrontation in any form is uncomfortable because you were never taught that you have the right to say no; in fact, you were taught that you can't say no.

Connectedness has the power to counterbalance adversity.

By birth, the newborn has 86 billion neurons; these will continue to grow and connect to create complex networks that allow the newborn to begin making sense of their world.

The typical college-age adult is 30 percent "less empathic" and more self-absorbed than twenty years ago. One study documented a 40 percent increase in psychopathology in American college students over the last thirty years;

The basic finding is that the experiences of the first two months of life have a disproportionately important impact on your long-term health and development. This has to do with the remarkably rapid growth of the brain early in life, and the organization of those all-important core regulatory networks (see