Quotes from Scott Adams

I can't memorize names and shake hands at the same time.

The computer cuts my production time in half. I love it.

Dilbert: I'm obsessed with inventing a perpetual motion machine. Most scientists think it's impossible, but I have something they don't. Dogbert: A lot of spare time? Dilbert: Exactly.

Decisions are made by people who have time, not people who have talent.

One of the reasons why you like to do your own drawings is, your style changes over time. And there's something about that that keeps it fresh to the viewer.

One strategy for getting ahead is being incredibly good at a particular skill; you need to be world-class to stand out for that skill. In my case, I layered fairly average skills together until the combination became special.

My failed corporate career became the fodder for the 'Dilbert' comic. Once it became clear I would not be climbing any higher on the corporate ladder, it freed me to mock managers without worrying that it would stall my career. Most failures create some sort of unplanned freedom. I took full advantage of mine.

I'm predicting that we'll finally have a computer will search my e-mail automatically and delete every message that begins with 'thought you'd be interested,' and then give an electrical shock to the sender to remind him or her to stop send that kind of message.

I've always defined myself not as a cartoonist, but as an entrepreneur. That was true before I tried cartooning. I always imagined cartooning would be how I got my seed capital. I always thought my other businesses would be the less dominant part of my life.

The most important thing when you study hypnosis is that you learn that humans are irrational. Until you understand that, hypnosis is hard to do... For me, it was this great awakening to understand that humans are deeply irrational, and it's probably the greatest influence on me in terms of my writing.

I'm a poor artist. Through brute force, I brought myself up to mediocre. I've never taken a writing class, but I can write okay.

No matter how many times I visit New York City, I am always struck by the same thing - a yellow taxicab.

Informed decision-making comes from a long tradition of guessing and then blaming others for inadequate results.

My investments have been hurt.

I respectfully decline the invitation to join your hallucination.

Remind people that profit is the difference between revenue and expense. This makes you look smart.

God designs people's emotions so you fall in love with people who, in return, wouldn't even use your hollowed-out skull for a spittoon.

I love magazines. It's such McNugget kind of information.

Every skill you acquire doubles your odds of success.

Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.

I've tried lots of things. The reality is, I'm excited by everything on Day 1. And if by Day X things aren't working the way I hoped, I lose my passion. I have not seen the correlation between my passion and my success.

It doesn't take many people to have a bad sense of humor to get in trouble at a corporation.

Psychology is the only necessary skill for running for president. Trump knows psychology.

The best way to compile inaccurate information that no one wants is to make it up.