Quotes from Billy Crystal

Bambi, to a kid, was scary.

I can't bear to think of life without Janice. I want to go first because I don't want to miss her, because that would be a pain far worse than any death.

'Parental Guidance' combines comedy and pathos in the best way.

Only once in a thousand years or so do we get to hear a Mozart or see a Picasso or read a Shakespeare. Ali was one of them, and yet at his heart, he was still a kid from Louisville who ran with the gods and walked with the crippled and smiled at the foolishness of it all.

Your success is in your point of view. It's your life that you're talking about; it's your observations. That's the best lesson that I ever had.

Doing my Broadway show '700 Sundays' reminded me how much I love working in front of an audience.

I have performed my one-man show '700 Sundays' over 400 times now. There were only two times that I can honestly say I was nervous. The first was when I knew Mel Brooks was in the audience, and the second was when Sid Caesar came.

I never stopped believing in us, and I never felt like I was wanting for anything, except for my father, and that was not going to be.

Kids need a happy household. They need to be loved and supported in their dreams. And I don't think you can make your kids' dreams your own. They need you to support them in their dreams.

It is better to look good than to feel good.

To be good, you need to believe in what you're doing.

Good news, they found Nemo! The bad news is, they found him in one of Wolfgang Puck's puff pastries.

I always came away thinking "I'd like to see her more," you know? And then when [Parental Guidance] was ready to be cast, we thought - Bette [Midler]. So we called her.

Even when I was in school shows, in elementary school doing plays, I'd always go off book and start improvising.

As a comedian, you have everything working against you.

That whole concept of 'I want to really go after people' - I don't understand that. Is it a roast, or is it an awards show?

No disrespect to Sweden: I didn't think of them as the comedy universe.

Don't give up your power.

The death of Sid Caesar on Wednesday caused a chain reaction in my soon-to-be-66-year-old mind. I was saddened, of course, but felt a sense of relief that he was at last free from the indignity of aging.

Whatever it is that's bothering me - interacting with annoying guy at a restaurant, contemplating my age, or losing friends to illness - I'll start to chip away at it. If you can poke holes in it, it's not as formidable; it's not as scary, and ultimately, it becomes another truth.

I think I've far exceeded what I ever thought I could possibly do.

When I first started, there were, like... two or three critics that you thought, 'Alright, I hope I get a good review from them.' And now there's millions of them.

The decision-making process was very difficult: is this how I want my career to start, with playing Jodie Dallas on this show?

Dad had a music store, and he'd often bring home comedy albums that I would listen to. I started listening to Bob Newhart and Bill Cosby, and developing taste. They really influenced my style of comedy.