Quotes from Jeff Strand

woman who'd called 911, an elderly black man, a woman who Barry could tell just from looking at her was either a cop or military, and...damn, a little kid. Maybe six years old. He was in the corner, crying, and since nobody was consoling him, he must've been separated from his parents.

I couldn't believe that I was going to die from being slowly eaten alive by chained-up elderly ladies who thought they were vampires. I'd always kind of figured that I would go peacefully in my sleep, after my wife dropped an anvil on my head.

I am going to make you hurt so badly you'll wish your mother had been skinned alive by your father before they had a chance to conceive you.

Farley gestured toward Roger's crutches. "The magazine business is dangerous, huh?" "More dangerous than you can imagine," said Roger. "Those computer terminals can be deadly. Hurt my leg typing an adjective.

Hi. I'm here to murder you. May I come in?

My blood ran ice-cold as I entered Human Resources.