Quotes About Humor

Marcus: Cherry? Jillian: My ten-year-old niece. Marcus: She's named after a piece of fruit? Jillian nodded. Jillian: So is her twin sister, Apple. Marcus: You're kidding me. Jillian: Unfortunately, I'm serious. Their father is fond of fruit pies and thought it would be cute. Marcus: And their mother didn't protest? Jillian: She thinks Steven's cute, so she gives him whatever he wants.

Come on, baby." Paris combed his fingers through her hair. "Look past my terrible personality and hideous looks and throw me a bone. Teach me how to woo you properly." She snorted. "I'd argue the hideous looks part." "But not the terrible personality? Ouch. That hurts, baby.

Har, har. You're a borderline fucktard, you know that? Torin to Strider

Fine," Strider said tightly. "You can. But you wont. Because you know that if you take the woman out of this home, I'll go gray from worry. And you like my hair the way it is." "Stridey-man. Are you hitting on my? Trying to get me to run my fingers through those mangy locks?" Gideon chuckled. "Sweetie pie." Striders lips even twitched into a grin. "You know I hate when you get mushy like that." Boy loved it. No question.

I put the fun in funeral.

My Zombie Ate Your Honor Student

The on and off thing is kind of annoying, isn't it? First with Cole, now with Gavin. "Maybe you need a tune up." I rolled my eyes. "I'll just pop into the supernatural ability repair shop sometime tomorrow." He grinned, his fingers tracing the line of my jaw.

Thinking about her again caused his body to harden, to ready... "Uh, I'm happy to sit close to you and everything, but I had no idea you would like it so much," Paris muttered. For the first time in hundreds of years, Maddox felt a blush creep into his cheek, "It's not for you." "Thank the gods," was his friends reply. -Maddox and Paris

Enjoy him while it lasts," I called. "Apparently he has Girlfriend ADD." She looked away, but not before I caught the blush staining her cheeks.

Kaia darling, Willaim said, nearly leaping over a stand of beef jerky in his haste to reach her. Are you here to fight the strippers who just enjoyed hours of my company? Hardly, she said, tossing her glorious mane of hair over her shoulder with a single flip of her wrist. I'm here to thank them for keeping you occupied. Please tell me they're still with you.

William to Paris: "I always figured you for the in and out type. Kinda stealthy, leaving the girl wondering whether you'd been there or not. But I didn't know you were quite this stealthy." (Paris) "Nice to know you've considered my sex life" "Hasn't everyone?" "Screw you" "Again, hasn't everyone?

Cole," she said, batting her lashes at him. "I'm seconds away from bringing your penis into this conversation. Are you sure you want to stick around for that?" He sighed. "You're about to threaten it, aren't you?" A new round of laughter from the girls. "Threaten?" Kat shook her head. "No, darling Cole. Remove? Yes.

Well," she said, getting more comfortable, "Here's what I've got so far. I'm going to college and getting a Ph.D. in being awesome. That's a thing, right? Everyone will call me Dr. Kitten and pay me megabucks to diagnose all their problems. Because, of course, I will have all the answers.

One of these days you're going to wake up," William finally said, "and I will have shaved you, Everywhere." (Paris) "Won't make a difference. Women will still want me.

So, yeah, I kind of wanted to claw her face off and spit in her skull. Graphic much? Straitlaced Ali piped up. Not graphic enough, Bloodthirsty Ali quipped. Hello, new personalities. So nice to meet you.

Devyn: "But what can I say? I'm irresistible." Bride: "No, you're a ho, but the good news is I'm ok with that!

His name is Tyson? I hate to break it to you, but you dated a brand of chicken.

You know I think you hung the moon, right?" "Right. Just like I know you held the ladder and looked up my skirt.

I cast a glance in my new admirer's direction. "You may call me Your Highness," I said. "Or Empress Beauty." He chuckled. I wasn't kidding.

See? This was how he'd gotten me to fall in love with him. At times like this he made me feel like the most treasured woman in the world. "So you don't remember doing this to me? Naked? In the shower? On the bed? On the floor?" With Matt Damon? Okay, how had the Sarah Silverman video gotten in my head, now of all times?

What's the difference between what you're saying and a knife? A knife has a point.

Sorry, Keys, but raisins are the result of nature taking a shit.

A few seconds later, her reply came in. WTF an A! I blinked, sure I was misreading. But no, the letters didn't change. Me: Nana, do U know what WTF means?? Her: Of course silly, it means "well, that's fantastic.

Ava said her hand accidentally slipped and made contact with her guy's nose. I said Repeatedly? And she said, 'Uh, yeah. I'm really clumsy.