Quotes About Humor

Humor is my sword and my shield. It protects me. You can open a door with humor and drive a truck right through.

Laughter is ever young, whereas tragedy, except the very highest of all, quickly becomes haggard.

A chuckle a day may not keep the doctor away, but it sure does make those times in life's waiting room a little more bearable.

Humor brings insight and tolerance.

A sense of humor can help you overlook the unattractive, tolerate the unpleasant, cope with the unexpected, and smile through the unbearable.

Humor is the instinct for taking pain playfully.

Humor is a means of obtaining pleasure in spite of the distressing effects that interface with it.

A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs, jolted by every pebble in the road.

Total absence of humor renders life impossible.

If I had no sense of humor, I should long ago have committed suicide.

A sense of humor judges one's actions and the actions of others from a wider reference ... it pardons shortcomings; it consoles failure. It recommends moderation.

Humor is an attitude. It's a way of looking at life and of telling others how you feel about what's happening around you.

When we can begin to take our failures non-seriously, it means we are ceasing to be afraid of them. It is of immense importance to learn to laugh at ourselves.

Now when I bore people at a party, they think it's their fault.

I am married to Beatrice Salkeld, a painter. We have no children, except me.

A fishing-rod was a stick with a hook at one end and a fool at the other.

The poor schlemiel is a man who falls on his back and breaks his nose.

Hain't we got all the fools in town on our side? And ain't that a big enough majority for any town?

How can they say my life is not a success? Have I not for more than sixty years gotten enough to eat and escaped being eaten?

I have gout, asthma, and seven other maladies, but am otherwise very well.

A friend must not be injured, even in jest.

The family. We are a strange little band of characters trudging through life sharing diseases and toothpaste, coveting one another's desserts, hiding shampoo, locking each other out of our rooms, inflicting pain and kissing to heal it in the same instant, loving, laughing, defending, and trying to figure out the common thread that bound us all together.

Have a place for everything and keep the things somewheres else. That is not advice, it is merely custom.

A good laugh makes any interview, or any conversation, so much better.