Quotes About Humor

Remind me one day to teach you how to achieve a sneer, Hugh. Yours is too pronounced, and thus but a grimace. It should be but a faint curl of the lips.

And now I wish I hadn't been civil, because he says he shall not despair! He is as stupid as Endymion!" "No, no!" said Alverstoke soothingly. "Nobody could be as stupid as Endymion!

Will you marry me, vile and abominable girl that you are? Yes, but, mind, it only to save my neck from being wrung!

His Grace was at her side, and lifted her down from the chair. "My enfant," he said , "duchesses do not dance on chairs, nor do they call their brothers 'imbécile'." Léonie's twinkled irrepressibly. "I do," she said firmly.

The charm of your society, my Sparrow, lies in not knowing what you will say next – though one rapidly learns to expect the worst!

When I was about 12 and first started wearing lipstick, my dad would ask, 'Are you wearing makeup?' I would say back, 'You're wearing more makeup there than I am!'

My friend Doris Bry says now that I've ruined her spelling because I misspell with such confidence.

I never did learn to spell. My friend Doris Bry says now that I've ruined her spelling because I misspell with such confidence.

If naturalists go to heaven (about which there is considerable ecclesiastical doubt), I hope that I will be furnished with a troop of kakapo to amuse me in the evening instead of television.

Well," said Larry with dignity, "it may give you pleasure to be woken at half-past three in the morning by a pigeon who seems intent on pushing his rectum into your eye...

I thought we were going to have chops,' complained Larry aggrievedly. 'I spent all morning getting my taste buds on tiptoe with the thought of chops. What happened to them?' 'I'm afraid it's the owls, dear,' said Mother apologetically. 'They have such huge appetites.' Larry paused, a spoonful of curry halfway to his mouth.

Are we having a plague of owls?' Larry inquired. 'Are they attacking the larder and zooming out with bunches of chops in their talons?

Roger and I would squat in the sweet-scented myrtles and lay bets with each other as to whether or not, on this particular morning, George was going to fight an olive tree.

Spiro, we have a problem,' he confessed. It was like saying 'walkies' to a bull mastiff.

Typical of the medical profession,' said Larry bitterly. 'They can't even spot a disease until the patient is twice life size.

have you heard about the young Hindu virgin from Kutch, who kept two tame snakes in her crutch, she said when they wriggle, it's a bit of a giggle, but my boyfriends don't like my crutch much. Ha ha ha!' 'Really, captain!' said Mother, outraged, 'I do wish you wouldn't recite poetry in front of Gerry.

Captain Creech's face, bobbing between Larry's and Donald's, had achieved an extraordinary mauve colour, rather like the bloom of a plum.

Why keep in touch with them? That's what I want to know,' asked Larry despairingly. 'What satisfaction does it give you? They're all either fossilized or mental.' 'Indeed, they're not mental,' said Mother indignantly. 'Nonsense, Mother... Look at Aunt Bertha, keeping flocks of imaginary cats... and there's Great-Uncle Patrick, who wanders about nude and tells complete strangers how he killed whales with a penknife...They're all bats.

There is an Anglo-Saxon form of riddling that plays with the polarities of words like bright and dark, cold and warm, throwing them against one another and crafting lines of rich, humorous nonsense like this poem that has been around for so many hundreds of years that you just have to sit back and, with nothing else in mind, laugh out loud. 

Survival requires that we learn to laugh things off and start over

He expects us to kill him," Palomides said to Dinadan. "Some people are so demanding," Dinadan replied. "Considering we've only just met, I mean.

Is a joke truly funny when we laugh at it, or is it merely some aberration of our frontal lobe?

I don't know what humor is.

All I know about humor is that I don't know anything about it.