Quotes About Humor

If snark could kill, I'd have to register my mouth with the FBI. :)

I resent it being a truth universally acknowledged, no matter what era I find myself in, that a single woman of thirty must be in want of a husband.

He who always prefaces his tale with laughter, is poised between impertinence and folly.

The horse-laugh indicates brutality of character.

The immoderate cannot laugh moderately.

The world is like a cucumber—today it's in your hand, tomorrow up your arse.

Like all young men I set out to be a genius, but mercifully laughter intervened.

You aren't too smart, are you? I like that in a man.

In the aftermath of the shooting, John did not experience any sense of relief at having survived the lethal series of assaults. Nor did he gloat over his victory. In fact, he was horrified that he had caused such severe physical damage to another human being. It didn't help that some of his fellow officers seized upon this opportunity to call him "back shooter" and other phrases used in police humor as a way of dealing with the trauma of violence.

I really didn't say everything I said. [...] Then again, I might have said 'em, but you never know.

So I'm ugly. I never saw anyone hit with his face.

You should always go to other people's funerals, otherwise, they won't come to yours.

If I felt any better I'd be unconscious.

Irony has always seemed the best approach to life, the best way to keep it at arm's length.

One time I introduced my orchestra as the Shampoo Music Makers instead of the Champagne Music Makers.

I used to think it was clever to confuse comedy with tragedy. Now I wish I could distinguish them.

As a standup, I try to change the world. As an entertainer, I try to entertain. And as a lesbian, I try to pick up the prettiest girl in the room.

It is difficult to be funny and great at the same time. Aristophanes and Moliere and Mark Twain must sit below Aristotle and Bossuet and Emerson.

Humour is the kindly contemplation of the incongruities of life.

The Victorians needed parody. Without it their literature would have been a rank and weedy growth, over-watered with tears.

It is to be observed that "angling" is the name given to fishing by people who can't fish.

Humour is essentially a comforter, reconciling us to things as they are in contrast to things as they might be.

Always, even on a solemn occasion like this, an undercurrent of laughter in her voice. She possessed a keen sense of the fundamental absurdity of life.

A dry little laugh at the grotesquerie of using this stock phrase. At having occasion to use it.