Quotes About Humor

He held up the AK-47, the muscles in his arm bunching against the weight. "This is an assault rifle." Then held up the handgun. "This is a semi-automatic pistol." Then he gave a little thrust of his hips and looked down at his penis. "That is my gun. As you've discovered, it's pumpaction like a shotgun , but it doesn't fire bullets.

You broke the Man Code, dude. 'No man shall knowingly and with malice aforethought kick another man in the nuts.' Okay, so I kicked him in the nuts. The little fucker was fleeing the scene of a crime where he'd pointed a weapon at my buddies. [from short story Beer Run at the end of Skin Deep]

I'm half italian Which half asked Tessa From the waist down

Oh, McBride, it's just you." Nate heard Julian say. "I saw a flash of white and thought you were the bride.

What's Walmart, do they sell like wall stuff?

Every woman should have four pets in her life. A mink in her closet, a jaguar in her garage, a tiger in her bed, and a jackass who pays for everything.

Wal-mart... do they like make walls there?

He's not human," Ajax blurted out. "Well, of course he bloody isn't," Agamemnon said. "His mother's a fish.

First-person narrators can't die, so as long as we keep telling the story of our own lives we're safe. Ha bloody fucking Ha.

It's the southern way, Doctor." "The southern way?" she said. "My mother's immortal phrase. We laugh when the pain gets too much. We laugh when the pity of human life gets too . . . pitiful. We laugh when there's nothing else to do." "When do you weep . . . according to the southern way?" "After we laugh, Doctor. Always. Always after we laugh.

It did not look like the work of God, but it might have represented the handicraft of a God with a joyous sense of humor, a dancing God who loved mischief as much as prayer, and playfulness as much as mischief.

Laughter is the only strategy that has ever worked at all for me when my world was falling apart.

Humor has always been the redemptive angel in the Conroys's sad history. With this family, I shall never grow hungry from lack of material.

I could rent Caesar out at birthday parties. Halloween parties. I could take pictures of Caesar eating a piece of birthday cake. Or a picture of a kid riding Caesar on his birthday. We could build a saddle.

Upstaged by a schizophrenic, Dallas said. The story of my life.

My poor boat poked along the waterway with the blinding speed of a manatee.

Courtesy is often the manifestation of trust, acceptance, and respect. We demonstrate courtesy by graciousness, consideration for one another, sincerity, listening, how we talk about teammates who aren't present, and the type of humor we use when jesting with one another.

Why, Hurst couldn't have hit the side of Westminster Abbey with a pistol, even by throwing the silly thing.

Ja pri?am pri?e. Mi svi izmišljamo pri?e. Pri?at ?u ti pri?e koje ?e te nasmijati. Volim da te gledam kako se smiješ. Nikad ne?u pobje?i iz ovog zatvora beskrajnih pri?a.

laughter is cathartic and cleansing, that it's good for the body and the soul, and when it's real it's better than sex.

Mary's ghost eventually. It was really all in fun.

Henry, for heaven's sake! You can't propose when I'm fainting!

My friends, I am not saying I know for a fact that there is no God. All I am saying is that if there is a divine force behind the universe, it is laughing hysterically at the religions we've created in an attempt to define it.

Ah, yes Langdon said with a knowing smile. Who better than a bunch of celibate octogeneraians to tell the world how to have sex? Sinskey was liking the professor more and more every second.