Quotes About Humor

Let me tell you, sisters, seeing dried egg on a plate in the morning is a lot dirtier than anything I've had to deal with in politics.

Osama, yo Mama didn't raise you right. When you were young, she must have wrapped your turban too tight.

What do I bring to the Democratic National Convention that other reporters don't? Hair.

I've always had my voice as a comic. I was never that into politics, or prop comedy.

I always wanted to get into politics, but I was never light enough to make the team.

I'm not a member of an organized party. I'm a Democrat.

Man is the only animal that laughs and has a state legislature.

I love to engage in repartee with people who are stupider than I am.

I've always wanted to do more significant stuff. I think of myself as well-informed, but the hardest thing to do is talk about politics and current events and be funny and not just preachy.

In less than a year, the Bush administration will strut out of office, leaving the country in roughly the same condition a toddler leaves a diaper.

We all joke about Congress but we can't improve on them. Have you noticed that no matter who we elect, he is just as bad as the one he replaces?

Republicans are so empty-headed, they wouldn't make a good landfill.

Politics ought to be fun. It shouldn't be just boring meetings.

Politics is much too serious to be taken too seriously; equally, there are many aspects of it so laughable as to be lamentable.

Political correctness? In my humor, I never talk about politics. I was never much into all that.

I don't know anything about politics. Like, zero. Nothing.

My politics are short and sweet, like the old woman's dance.

Religious humor is not really my area, so I probably wouldn't do anything about that, or politics or something.

A political satirist's job is to draw blood. I'm not so much interested in politics as I am in overthrowing the government.

Wit puts politicians at risk.

Tell me a boat full of lawyers just sank.

I would do almost anything Tina Fey asks me to do.

Walter Mondale once said God has no place in American politics and it turned out that God felt the same way about Walter Mondale.

Senators are a never-ending source of amusement, amazement, and discouragement.