Quotes About Humor

I was also going to give a graduation speech in Arizona this weekend. But with my accent, I was afraid they would try to deport me.

You wonder sometimes how our government puts on its pants in the morning.

No one is better at not beating America than England.

There's plenty of room for humor in politics, God knows, but it's a serious business.

Forgot to live-tweet the election last night, so I'm post-tweeting today. I'll start as soon as my fingers unclench from their rage fists.

It's August, which means Congress is on recess and Mitch McConnell has shimmied back into the ocean to seek a mate.

Mixing humor and politics is something that works.

The most valuable function performed by the federal government is entertainment.

Politicians... talk in generalities and lies, and I think they've caused all our grief. They're so awful, they're really funny. I hate thinking this because my dad loved politics.

Someone told me it was a round thing that gobbles up money. I thought that was Tip O'Neill.

I don't get controversial, I don't get political and I don't tell you what to do with your life. I just go out there and tell some stories, and people can relate.

It's so much more fun to watch FOX when it's someone else being blitzed & sacked!

I don't really have funny things to say about politics. I wish I did, but I don't.

For some reason I get advertised when I travel as a political comedian, which I'm not. Sometimes I talk about it and sometimes I don't.

George Bush has met more foreign heads of state than I have. But a substantial number of them were dead.

Compared to politics, I think sports is funnier, because it's inconsequential. And politics can be real important and all that. The more pointless something is, the funnier it is, you know?

I think that humor has become a principle means of communication among Americans about politics.

As a politician he does everything to keep out of trouble often by not asking questions. However it does bother him that every time the doorbell rings his maid hides in the dryer.

Always laugh when you can. It is cheap medicine.

The most wasted day of all is that on which we have not laughed.

In everyday life, I use positive thoughts, sense of humor, Taekwondo, running, and yoga to make me stronger.

Only thing I am testing positive for is Pasta or Cheese.

This I conceive to be the chemical function of humor: to change the character of our thought.

If you don't learn to laugh at troubles, you won't have anything to laugh at when you grow old.