Quotes About Humor

I guess Mr. Klutz will have to get another sub for our class," said Emily.

Boys go to Mars to get candy bars. Girls go to Jupiter to get more stupider.

Miss Small is off the wall!

I barely touched her stupid elbow. She was moaning and holding her arm like an elephant stepped on it.

Do you have a dungeon down in the basement where you put the bad kids?" I asked. "Actually, the dungeon is on the third floor," Principal Klutz replied. Nobody laughed this time. He quickly told us that he was just making a joke and that he didn't even have a dungeon at all. Principal Klutz must have felt bad that we didn't think his joke was funny, because he invited us all up to the front of the room to touch his bald head. We did, and that

Nicholas was yanking our chain. Everybody knows there were no schools in dinosaur times. Besides, it would be hard to ride a dinosaur. They don't even make saddles for them. Dr. Nicholas would have had to ride the dinosaur bareback.

The three of us got up and shook our butts at the class.

Neil the nude kid even though he wears clothes. "Maybe he rented it," said Michael. "You can rent anything. There's probably a place called Rent-a-Turkey.

But it's not cool to laugh at your parents' jokes, as you well know.

just joking!" I protested. "I hate poetry." "Come on, A.J.," said

Dumb Miss Daisy and Principal Klutz

Then we'd have to go to Dirk School, which is a school for dorks on the other side of town.

I see London, I see France I see Emily's underpants.

Ooooo!" Ryan said. "A.J. and Andrea have great chemistry together. They must be in love!" "When are you gonna get married?" asked Michael.

Miss Daisy was really dumb! Even I know what you get when you multiply four times four. But that smarty-pants-I-know-everything-girl Andrea Young beat me to it and got called on first.

She must be the tallest person in the history of the world! Miss Small was the opposite of her name. It was like a fat guy was named Mr. Thin or a dumb guy was named Mr. Smart or a really handsome guy was named Mr. Ugly or…well, you get the idea.

On the morning of the wedding, my mom said I had to wear a jacket and tie. What's up with that? Why do men have to wear a dumb cloth around their neck? Whoever thought up that idea should get the Nobrain Prize. That's a prize they give to people who don't have brains.

Laughter is the only thing that cuts trouble down to a size where you can talk to it.

Laughter is the only thing that cuts trouble down to a size where you can talk to it. -- character Billy Clyde Puckett in Semi-Tough

The thing about bozos is that bozos don't know that they're bozos. Bozos think they're the shit, which makes them really annoying but also incredibly entertaining, depending on your point of view.

Too depressed for a Slurpee? Now that's depressed. My

Life has three rules: Paradox, Humor, and Change. - Paradox: Life is a mystery; don't waste your time trying to figure it out. - Humor: Keep a sense of humor, especially about yourself. It is a strength beyond all measure - Change: Know that nothing ever stays the same.

Life has three rules: Paradox, Humor, and Change. - Paradox: Life is a mystery; don't waste your time trying to figure it out. - Humor: Keep a sense of humor, especially about yourself. It is a strength beyond all measure - Change: Know that nothing ever stays the same.

If we hear a joke so awful that we laugh at how bad it is, we are taking part in the irony; in other words, the joke did not contain irony; irony was provided by our response. Why is it ironic? Because the intent of the joke was to get laughter, and it did—but for the wrong reason.