Quotes About Humor

Gideon laughed and took his milkshake from the opened lid of the glove compartment.

About what you'd expect, was Gideon's grumpy and uncharitable thought, if you crossed John Gielgud with W. C. Fields.

Gideon resisted a strange urge to laugh. Looks like homicide. What did he think—that a heart attack had blown away half the man's head?

Jak looks at me mock-longingly and spouts three more random Spanish words: "Amor y cacahuetes." "Love and peanuts?" I ask. Jak nods. "Love and peanuts.

I think you should know that real-life white people are not all as funny as the ones on 'Seinfeld'.

And a wheat thin the size of Lake Tahoe.

SHUT THE MILK UP ABBEY" hahaha something with the fam.

They told me that "with age comes wisdom", but all I got was hemorrhoids." - Lecture tour for "Steal This Urine Test

I thought you'd come back to get married,' he said with a grin. 'Not to carry out an archaeological project.' 'Cut out that getting married stuff,' I said, and in this way we smilingly slid past the troublesome moment.

Someone once defined humor as a way to keep from killing yourself. I keep my sense of humor and I stay alive.

It's funny, the hardest thing to do is to make something look like it's fast, loose and improvised, and get somebody to laugh.

Laughing at the oppression of women is the best medicine for those who fear being laughed at.

Can you inform me, gentlemen, where General Grant procures his whisky? . . . Because if I can find out, I'll send a barrel of it to every General in the field!

"The sun," said Mr. Bull, "never sets on English dominion. Do you understand how that is?" "oh, yes" said the Indian, "that is because God is afraid to trust them in the dark."

Has it not got down as thin as the homeopathic soup that was made by boiling the shadow of a pigeon that had starved to death?

I feel just like the boy who stubbed his toe–too damned badly hurt to laugh and too damned proud to cry!

[I feel] somewhat like the boy in Kentucky who stubbed his toe while running to see his sweetheart. The boy said he was too big to cry, and far too badly hurt to laugh.

With the fearful strain that is on me night and day, if I did not laugh I should die.

I laugh because I must not cry, that is all, that is all.

Odat Kochamma is the tonic Parambil needs. The old lady is ceaseless in her toil. Within a week, Big Ammachi comes to rely on being fussed at, told to sit down and rest, or made to laugh so hard she has to pee.

I pull alongside him," Hawk said. "And you roll down the window. Ask that motherfucker if he got any Grey Poupon." "I was thinking the exact same thing," I said. "Or perhaps we discreetly tail him hither and yon to find a good place for a proper introduction.

Dying is easy. Comedy is difficult.

called to testify in a court case. Asked to identify himself, he announced that he was the world's greatest architect. When asked how he could make such a statement, he replied, with visible enjoyment and a gleam in his eye, that he had no choice, he was under oath.

I don't know anything about computers.