Quotes About Humor

Life cannot purely rely on thoughts. Action is required with better sence of humour.

Life.... It's better than the alternative.

When life throws a lemon at you, you throw it straight back at life and miss completely. That's my logic.

If I'll be funnier than this, I'll become a joke.

I wear the writer pants in the family.

Something can be very funny and then suddenly very terrifying-very exciting, and suddenly very ridiculous. I think that's what life is like, that's what interests me.

There are many things evil people can take from you. However, they can never steal your ability to laugh and laugh loud.

Baptists never make love standing up. They're afraid someone might see them and think they're dancing.

When My Love Returns from the Ladies Room, Will I Be Too Old to Care?

I love myself when I am laughing. . . and then again when I am looking mean and impressive.

The Mexican...is familiar with death. [He] jokes about it, caresses it, sleeps with it, celebrates it. It is one of his favorite toys and his most steadfast love.

My friends tell me I have an intimacy problem. But they don't really know me.

I love deadlines. I like the whooshing noise they make as they go by.

I love sushi, but I'm not going to write a column about it.

He gave her a look that you could have poured on a waffle.

If you can make a girl laugh, you can make her do anything.

I'd like to do a comedy with Emma Thompson. I admire her as an actress so much. I love her. And I didn't know it until recently that her whole career started in comedy.

It was the first time I was ever in love, and I learned a lot. Before that I'd never even thought about killing myself.

I love long walks on the beach, big dicks, and fried chicken.

I be goofy, kinda funny. Acting stupid but they love me.

I love to have battles of the wits with people that can dish fast and dirty - and it leads to problems occasionally, 'cause I can sound mean without attempting to be mean.

I mean, I do love clever and witty, but I think that the 'Three Stooges' were geniuses. They'd have to be for their appeal to have lasted this long.

Kids eh? Little treasures, I love 'em... couldn't eat a whole one though.

Satirists gain the applause of others through fear, not through love.