Quotes About Humor

I'm not overweight. I'm just nine inches too short.

I don't know which will upset you more," she replied. "Telling you it's nothing but clutter or confessing that I often take it out and play 'I am Boba Fett' when I don't think anyone can see me.

I'm a whore!" Miki hit the brakes...her hands.. gripping the steering wheel, glanced at Sara. "You're not wearing any underwear, are you?" Sara let out a strangled squeal...

It wasn't until someone kicked his legs that Nik woke up. Alek, snoring beside him, his head resting on his shoulder. Ban snoring on the other couch, the noise rivaled only by the dog. He looked into the impossibly cranky face of Zach Sheridan. "Y'all get food?" "We had a full refrigerator before you three got here." "Where I come from, we don't let the refrigerator get empty." "Where you come from, you marry your sister.

She still sighed out her answer, though. "Fine. I'll go." "Now, darlin'. I know I'm pulling you away from playing grab ass with my oldest boy on his nice hardwood floor…" Angie barely stopped herself from spitting out her mouthful of coffee. "But if he's anything like his daddy, trust me, he'll still be here when you get back.

You're like seven feet tall, aren't you?" "I am not seven feet tall," he snapped at her as if she'd really insulted him. "I'm six-eleven." When she smirked in disbelief, he added, "And three-quarters.

It's just taking some getting used to. The snarling, the hissing, the purring. Then I have to deal with it from the baby…." "Ha, ha," Mace stated dryly.

Don't threaten me with your eyebrows. I'm not. I'm interrogating you with my one raised eyebrow. If I was threatening you, I'd use both eyebrows. Like this.

Arms crossed over that massive chest, the lion looked down his nose at Smitty as only a cat could. "What else have you taught my son? How to chase his tail? Lick his ass?" "Nah, I stuck with the cat basics. Park lazy ass under tree, sleep twenty hours, eat all the food after the females do all the hunting, take a few minutes to roar, then sleep another twenty hours.

Well, so you don't get too cocky, I myself often complete the TV Guide crossword puzzle." He puffed out his chest. "In pen.

Lock reached for the French toast first, but Ric slapped his hand away and placed a carefully prepared plate in front of him. As Lock waited, Ric went to the counter and returned with a small strainer. He tapped the side, covering the French toast with powdered sugar. Somehow the wolf managed not to get any on Lock's bacon or sausage. "There. Isn't that nice?" "I have to say our relationship is getting stranger and stranger as we get older.

Do you ride?" She smiled, her fingers lightly sliding around his ear. "Not since I hit that barn" Zach's hands paused on her flesh. "You hit a barn?" "I had to avoid the cow

Give her to me." Turning away with his prize, Lock shook his head. "No. Get your own cat." "She's my sister.

Oh, look. The idiot of the jungle awakens.

Miki burst into laughter while Angelina looked validly concerned. "Sara, honey, you've got to let your toy go." "Hey!" Zach snapped.

Hey, hey!" Gwen said excitedly. "Look at this! Look at this!" She extended her arm and gave him the finger.

Then it sounds to me like you love her. And if you love her, then tell her she belongs to you and she needs to get over it. Show her who's in charge. That's what I did with Sara." Zach seemed less than pleased when they all laughed so hard Conall actually fell off the bed.

While the two females snarled viciously at each other, Ric grabbed a stick from the ground and waved it between Jess and Blayne. "Look! Look! A stick! Who wants it? Who wants it? Go get it!" He threw the stick and Jess and Blayne watched it flip across the forest floor. Once it landed, they looked back at Ric. "Dude," Jess told him, "that was just rude.

I thought it was bad when they made me wear this Jane Austen–suitor outfit, complete with cravat. But you! You look like you just escaped the set of Braveheart.

All right fine!" she snapped. "I'm in love with you. There. I said it. Now get over yourself." "You know, I think those are the words written on the Taj Mahal: 'I said it. Now get over yourself.' Some of the greatest love stories have started with those words.

She needed to say something sexy and romantic with a mere hint of her vast intelligence. Something that would entice him into bed. But what came out was, "I wanna fuck." -Miki Kendrick

What's the matter?" And she could hear the smile in his voice. "Cat got your crotch?

Conridge leaned across the table and touched Conall's arm. "I wouldn't worry." She motioned toward her husband. "I stabbed him in the leg and set his Mercedes on fire before I agreed to marry him. She just needs time."Conall frowned. "Uh…thank you?

Mitch opened his eyes, closed them, and then opened them wide. "There are big breasts in my face," he announced to anyone who would listen.