Quotes About Joke

Q: Did you hear about the new pirate movie? A: It's rated aaaargh.

Waiter, waiter! This soup tastes funny. Then why aren't you laughing?

That's the Irish People all over - they treat a serious thing as a joke and a joke as a serious thing.

Every time there's a cut in the action, we joke and dance around, there's show tunes and fart noises.

And my girlfriend, she's FAT! How fat? She's so fat she wears two watches-one for each time zone!

It all began with Adam. He was the first man to tell a joke--or a lie. How lucky Adam was. He knew when he said a good thing, nobody had said it before. Adam was not alone in the Garden of Eden, however, and does not deserve all the credit; much is due to Eve, the first woman, and Satan, the first consultant. - Notebook, 1867

He seemed to resonate with a kind of confidence that life was still nothing but a joke - an endless succession of soccer goals, trickery, and a constant repertoire of meaningless chatter.

Consider the Jewish joke, with the old lady running distractedly along the seashore: Help! My son the doctor is drowning. Amusing, I suppose. Her pride, I suppose, is amusing: it is greater than her love.

If now the all-mother sends forth her children without protection to a thousand threatening dangers, this can only be because she knows that if they fall they fall back into her womb, where they are safe; therefore their fall is a mere jest.

What has 32 legs and 1 tooth?' What?' we all asked. A West Virginia unemployment line.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The Truth. No joke.

never's the word God listens for when he needs a laugh.

If our faith is strong, we'll go to heaven, and we'll understand the whole thing when we get there. As if life were a joke, and heaven the place where the cosmic punchline is finally explained to us.

Luck was a joke. Even good luck was just bad luck with its hair combed.

There's an old joke about Alzheimer's: the good news is that you meet new people every day.

My father, " she said, pronouncing it fadder, and Beverly saw that her dress had also changed. It had become a scabrous, peeling black. The cameo was a skull, its jaw hung in a diseased gape. "His name was Robert Gray, better known as Bob Gray, better known as Pennywise the Dancing Clown. Although that was not his name, either. But he did love his joke, my fadder.

My wife and I were happy for 20 years. Then we met.

The KKK adopted a highway. The joke is on them: It's black.

Sometimes I feel that I am destined always to be offstage whenever the main action occurs. That God has made me the victim of some cosmic practical joke, by assigning me little more than a walk-on part in my own life. Or sometimes I feel that my role is simply to be a spectator to other people's stories, and always to wander away at the most important moment, drifiting into the kitchen to make a cup of tea just as the denouement unfolds.

There is a special pleasure in the irony of a moralist brought down for the very moral failings he has condemned. It's the pleasure of a well-told joke. Some jokes are funny as one-liners, but most require three verses: three guys, say, who walk into a bar one at a time, or a priest, a minister, and a rabbi in a lifeboat. The first two set the pattern, and the third violates it. With hypocrisy, the hypocrite's preaching is the setup, the hypocritical action is the punch line.

Has anyone got any bandages? I've just split my sides laughing.

A lot of truth is said in jest.

How many genetic engineers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Eleven—one to do the work, and the other ten to figure out why it doesn't have a double helix." "What's the definition of a virgin genetic engineer? A nerd with too many pocket protectors.

It all came out like word vomit — inadequacy, embarrassment, insecurity, neediness, and an attempt at a joke. But this last fell flat.