Quotes About Toilet

Marla said, This isn't like when guys sit backward on the toilet and pretend it's a motorcycle. This is a genuine accident.

The tiny space, the toilet, two hundred strangers just a few inches away, it's so exciting, the lack of room to maneuver, it helps if you're double-jointed. Use your imagination. Some creativity and a few simple stretching exercises and you can be knock, knock, knockin' on heaven's door. You'll be amazed how time flies.

sedÄ›l jsem tu v marné touze, chtÄ›l jsem srát, vÅ¡ak prdÄ›l pouze

At the store, they have one-hundred-percent-recycled toilet paper," Marla says. The worst job in the whole world must be recycling toilet paper." I

I noticed with a spasm of fierce disgust that the former Counselor of the Tsar, after thoroughly easing his bladder, had not flushed the toilet. That solemn pool of alien urine with a soggy, tawny cigarette butt disintegrating in it struck me as a crowning insult, and I wildly looked around for a weapon.

The typical American flushes the toilet five times a day at home, and uses 18.5 gallons (70 liters) of water, just for that.5

I saw someone who was hoarding toilet paper. I told him what to do with it. What could he say? It was what he was planning anyway.

The main trouble with women is that they will just not put the seat back up again.

A strip of white paper was looped around the seat of the toilet bowl to certify that no one had sat there since the strip was placed in position. The toilet paper from the toilet-paper holder in the wall to the left of the toilet seat was soft and very absorbent, and would stick to the anus.

The only process you've mastered is the process of elimination, and the only reason you've mastered that is because you can do it in the toilet.

He was discovered with his feet stuck to the ceiling in the bathroom with his head stuffed in the toilet...

There was also the issue of his hygiene. He was still convinced, against all evidence, that his vegan diets meant that he didn't need to use a deodorant or take regular showers. "We would have to literally put him out the door and tell him to go take a shower," said Markkula. "At meetings we had to look at his dirty feet." Sometimes, to relieve stress, he would soak his feet in the toilet, a practice that was not as soothing for his colleagues.

I ran out of toilet paper and started using lettuce leaves. Today was just the tip of the iceberg; tomorrow romaines to be seen.

We used to think the apocalypse would be anarchy and zombies. Turns out it's home offices and no toilet paper.

I used to spin the toilet paper like I was on Wheel of Fortune. Now I turn it like I'm cracking a safe.

Experimenting later, in a coffee shop toilet, I discover that I have acquired a couple of raking-tools-cum-hairgrips. Also a tube of mascara: something called Glam'Eyes Lash Flirt, a product which would attract me more had it been less reckless with its apostrophe.

It was a weird sensation. Like getting caught eavesdropping, or lying, or sitting on the toilet and having the bathroom walls suddenly drop away.

The knife easily cut through the silky material of my shirt and my bra, and a huge wad of toilet paper fell out.

Timmy, who made a daring escape, also made a mistake of paying the taxi driver with a check made out of toilet paper.

There's a deep underlying unpredictability to life that is thrilling. In China, my wife would say you go out to buy toilet paper, and you come back, and something interesting or revealing or funny happened on the way.

What they have done in Japan, which I find so inspirational, is they've brought the toilet out from behind the locked door. They've made it conversational. People go out and upgrade their toilet. They talk about it. They've sanitized it.

I have no system of writing. It's chaos. I could be upside down on my bedroom floor; I'll be scribbling on a pad that I'll then lose. I'll be on the toilet with my laptop on, sitting in the pub with my iPad.

As he flushed, an unexpected realization hit him. This is the Pope's toilet, he thought. I just took a leak in the Pope's toilet. He had to chuckle. The Holy Throne.

As he flushed, an unexpected realization hit him. This is the Pope's toilet, he thought. I just took a leak in the Pope's toilet. He had to chuckle. The Holy Throne.