Quotes About Comedy

As it stands right now, I lead Richard Pryor in heart attacks, two to one. However, Richard still leads me, one to nothing, in burning yourself up.

Laughter is good for you. Nine out of ten stand-up comedians recommend laughter in the face of intense stupidity.

I don't have a caustic sense of humor. What I find funny, that humor comes from a much gentler place.

If you can't hear me, it's because I'm in parentheses.

Jesus died for your sins. I'm doing it for your mere entertainment dollar.

You can always tell somebody's sense of humor by if they like this movie or not.

You learn very very quickly that it is mostly about swearing, actually. That's all you're doing, swearing, in a box with wheels.

Improvisation is just writing in front of an audience.

For me, suspense doesn't have any value if it's not balanced by humor.

Nothing is better than the unintended humor of reality.

If you can't joke about the most horrendous things in the world, what's the point of jokes? What's the point in having humor? Humor is to get us over terrible things.

I went to a tent store. "What kind of tent do you need?" "Circus."

I knew a girl so ugly, I took her to the top of the Empire State building and planes started to attack her.

There is the vegetarian Hot Pocket for those of us who don't want to eat meat, but would still like diarrhea.

People say satire is dead. It's not dead; it's alive and living in the White House.

I once asked a policeman how far it was to the subway. he said, "I don't know, no one has ever made it".

Every comic went through their Mitch Hedberg phase - the glasses, the hair in the face - and you knew immediately when they were doing it.

The secret source of humor is not joy but sorrow.

I believe humor nullifies violence.

There are many things that I find attractive about a woman. Foremost to me, of course, would be a sense of humor-but that doesn't come in a bottle.

Mmm, tastes like hepatitis!

I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day. Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

I've learned to have absolutely no regrets about any jokes I've ever done.

It's a very important skill set for an actor to be able to bring the humor into any moment, whether you're doing drama or comedy.