Quotes About Wit

Humor comes from self-confidence.

My grandmother was a very tough woman. She buried three husbands and two of them were just napping.

If you want to get rid of a man, I suggest saying, "I love you. I want to marry you. I want to have your children." Sometimes they leave skid marks.

There are different kinds of humor, some is sarcastic, some introspective. Introspective fit my personality better.

she'd also said more than once that I wasn't half as clever as I thought I was. Considering what I thought of myself, that still made me pretty damn clever.

And he had it all over Octavian, let me tell you. Hung like a Pegasus, he was.

Of all the people I've ever met; you're one of them!

Has anyone ever told you," I said, "that you coalesce reality?" "No. They only say that I'm good in the sack." "They are accurate but limited," I said. "And if you give me their names I'll kill them.

Why don't you slip out of those wet clothes and into a dry Martini?

Drawing on my fine command of the English language, I said nothing.

without knowing what is funny, one is constantly in danger of being funny without knowing it.

All my life I've wanted, just once, to say something clever without losing my train of thought.

I want someone to laugh with me, someone to be grave with me, someone to please me and help my discrimination with his or her own remark, and at times, no doubt, to admire my acuteness and penetration

It's amazing how much funny stuff there is.... [A] river of rich comedic milk is flowing across the land, and as fast as I skim off the cream more cream appears.... I may be doomed to wade around forever in other people's pith. Not that it's such a bad life.

It is occasionally used to imitate the court jester, who plays the fool but knows he is smarter than the king. He talks and talks and entertains, and no one suspects that he is more than just a fool.

any rash fool can be a hero if he sets no value on his life, or hasn't the wit to appreciate danger. But to understand the risk, perhaps even to flinch at first, but then to summon the strength to face them down - that in my opinion is the most commendable form of valour

he possessed for attractive form of courage: bravery of a nervous man. After all, any rash fool can be a hero if he sets no value on his life or hasn't the wit to appreciate the danger. But to understand the risks, perhaps even to flinch at first, but then summon the strength to face them down--that is my opinion is the most commendable for of value...

That doesn't sound very attractive, laughed Anne. I like people to have a little nonsense about them.

She had...the glimmerings of a sense of humour - which is simply another name for a sense of the fitness of things.

No sabes que solo los más tontos son los que hablan en serio todo el tiempo?

Well, I thought it was funny. -Stephen Colbert

Please, I always use fresh sarcasm, never canned.

The short one with the scar shifted from foot to foot. "Yeah, this is Russell," he motioned at the Indian, "and this is Newt." I almost said, "Newt," aloud, but figured we had enough problems without me being a smart-ass. And people say I don't know when to keep my mouth shut.

Colin mustered a perfunctory leer, but his mind was obviously elsewhere. 'Do you know...' he began. I knew many things, but I didn't think he needed to hear the entirety of the Prologue to the Canterbury Tales right at just this moment.