Quotes About Wit

That was the problem with snide comments; they invariably lost all their punch on repetition. Besides, when facing impending death, what did the odd witticism matter?

All womankind, from the highest to the lowest love jokes; the difficulty is to know how they choose to have them cut; and there is no knowing that, but by trying, as we do with our artillery in the field, by raising or letting down their breeches, till we hit the mark.

Now don't let us give ourselves a parcel of airs, and pretend that the oaths we make free with in this land of liberty of ours are our own; and because we have the spirit to swear them,—imagine that we have had the wit to invent them too.

Great wits jump

el trote vivaz y el lento raciocinio eran, como el ingenio y el juicio[44], movimientos incompatibles.

Wit is the most dangerous talent you can possess. It must be guarded with great discretion and good-nature, otherwise it will create you many enemies." —John Gregory A Father's Legacy to His Daughters , 1774

You see, that is the sad, sorry, terrible thing about sarcasm. It's really funny.

It's both funny and sad which seem to me to be the two basic ingredients of good comedy.

Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds. A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing.

If Einstein was so smart how come people only call you 'Einstein' when you do something really stupid ?

My theory of evolution is that Darwin was adopted.

It is rare to find learned men who are clean, do not stink and have a sense of humour.

It is one of the triumphs of human wit ... to conquer by humility and submissiveness ... to make oneself small in order to appear great ... such ... are often the expedients of the neurotic.

Criticism is as often a trade as a science, requiring, as it does, more health than wit, more labour than capacity, more practice than genius.

Asked in 1919 whether it was true that only three people in the world understood the theory of general relativity, [Eddington] allegedly replied: 'Who's the third?

A joke is a witticism or play on words that's meant to be funny. I say 'meant to be' because most jokes aren't funny. They range between mildly amusing and grimace-inducingly annoying.

Humor is rare in science fiction... there's so little of it that it automatically reminds you of other heroes with that acerbic humor when you find it.

Being funny is one of my greatest strengths. I can make girls smile when they're down, and when they're having a good time, I can carry on the joke.

It's easy to smile when you have a squirrel's intellect.

Such labour'd nothings, in so strange a style, Amaze th' unlearn'd and make the learned smile.

The wittiest authors evoke a barely perceptible smile.

..her smile, which was her pretty feature, was never so pretty as when her sprightly phrase had a scratch lurking in it.

Nothing sharpens the arrow of sarcasm so keenly as the courtesy that polishes it; no reproach is like that we clothe with a smile and present with a bow.

Smile. Nod. Say something witty before he finds out what an incredible geek you are.