Quotes About Wit

I never tell anyone exactly how clever I am. They would be too scared.

Hey, look—your girlfriend is saying something." Artemis had a vast mental reserve of scathing comebacks at his disposal, but none of them covered girlfriend insults. He wasn't even sure if it was an insult. And if it was, who was being insulted? Him or the girl?

These men were giants of their era and would remain legendary figures in England for generations to come. George Selwyn was one. Renowned as a wit and celebrated as a macabre connoisseur of corpses, criminals, and executions, he was something like a combination of Truman Capote and Vincent Price.

Wit and its employment as a weapon not only in political combat but in playing with one's friends was at the core of the Goostree's Gang.

Johnson ambled over. "Took you sweet time getting here, Malone." "kiss mine, Johnson." The other detective grinned. "No thanks, I've got standards." Quentin hooted at that. The other detective had notoriously bad taste in women.

What the hell makes you so smart?" I asked. "I wouldn't go for coffee with you, " she answered. "Listen -- I wouldn't ask you." "That, "she replied "is what makes you stupid.

What the hell makes you smart?" I asked. "I wouldn't go for coffee with you." "Listen - I wouldn't ask you." "That," she replied, "is what makes you stupid.

Life is a joke. The only way to survive it is to find the right punchline.

Life is full of amusement to an amusing man.

smartass like him.

He threw a fireball at me. I threw a chimney stack at him - that's the London way.

Bollocks, I thought, or testiculi or possibly testiculos if we were using the accusative.

No," said the fox. "But the bag of cheese puffs she's carrying might be." "Hahaha," I said. "Boom bloody boom." "On Earth as it is on television," said the fox, and ducked out of sight.

This is where the whole ape-descended thing reveals its worth, I thought madly, sucks to be you, quadruped.

clerihew: Fuchs Looks Like an ascetic Theoretic

There are no fools so troublesome as those that have wit.

The great secret of succeeding in conversation is to admire little, to hear much; always to distrust our own reason, and sometimes that of our friends; never to pretend to wit, but to make that of others appear as much as possibly we can; to hearken.

At 20 years of age the Will reigns; at 30 the Wit; at 40 the Judgment.

Some to make themselves considerable pursue Learning, others grasp at Wealth, some aim at being thought witty, and others are only careful to make the most of an handsome Person; But what is Wit, or Wealth, or Form, or Learning when compar'd with Virtue? 'Tis true, we love the handsome, we applaud the Learned, and we fear the Rich and Powerful; but we even Worship and adore the Virtuous.

Perhaps I was too saucy & provoking.

There's many witty men whose brains can't fill their bellies.

Whether it's an innate ability or an acquired way of regarding the world around us, being labeled as funny can only be accepted as a compliment.

The beauty of comedy is you can really push things. Hopefully, you're with people with a sense of humor and can relate to it.

Mary Holland is really funny.