Quotes from Janet Evanovich

That was just like a ride," he said. "Did you see me going around in there? Like a fun house, right? Like an amusement park. I ride all those rides. I'm used to that sort of thing. I sit right up front.

Sometimes I envy people who smoke. They always look so happy when they suck in that first lungful of tar. I can't think of many things that make me that happy. Maybe birthday cake.

You got no control.' 'Excuse me?' my mother said. 'No control? I am the queen of control. Look at this family. I have a daughter in Disney World with Oogily-Woogily Smoochikins. I have a granddaughter who thinks she's a horse. I have a mother who thinks she's a teenager.' She turned to me. 'And you! I don't even know where to begin.

I took a shower and spent some time on my hair, doing the blow-drying thing, adding some gel and some spray. When I was done I looked like Cher on a bad day. Still, Cher on a bad day wasn't all that bad. I was down to my last clean pair of spandex shorts. I tugged on a matching sports bra that doubled as a halter top and slid a big, loose, purple T-shirt with a large, droopy neck over my head. I laced up my hightop Reeboks, crunched down my white socks, and felt pretty cool.

They have cracked souls," she said. "You know how some people are born with physical defects? Like those sweet Down syndrome babies. I think some people are born with souls that aren't all there. Or maybe their souls got a crack somewhere along the line. Like a broken leg, only it's a soul.

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Okay, but who knows what happens at night? They could come alive like the zombies." I turned the corner and drove to my parents' house. "You need cake." "Hell, yeah.

When I was young, I got a lot of tattoos, and now they don't look so good. One time, I got drunk and got Eisenhower tattooed on my balls, but now he looks like Orville Redenbacher.

Virgil said fortune favors the bold.

Are you a feminist?" "You bet your ass," Lula said. "Unless I need something done that's man's work.

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Babe, nothing's been happening in my bed, and no one's going to see your underpants in this meeting unless you go goofy.

Probably, it's like driving the turnpike," Connie said. "Probably, you get used to it. The way I see it, living in New Jersey is a challenge, what with the toxic waste and the eighteen-wheelers and the armed schizophrenics. I mean, what's one more lunatic shooting at you?

but I'm a Jersey girl. And Jersey girls always get their man.

I owe you." "We could use a baby-sitter next Friday." "I don't owe you that much.

police station.

You underestimate me. I'm pretty fucking mean." Morelli grinned. "You're a marshmallow. Soft and sweet and when you get heated up you go all gooey and delicious.

I figured if you had to breathe New Jersey air there wasn't much point in getting carried away with always eating healthy food.

She stuffed the goodies into her hidden running belt, jogged out of the park, and went shopping for duct tape, a razor blade, paper clips, and another disposable phone.

bottles of water on it to keep

I'm living in a television sitcom, she told herself. I'm being stalked by a guy who worships the God of the Dead and my ex-husband is naked and in my kitchen. I never aspired to being normal, but this is too weird even for me.

You can't give up your identity and your goals in the name of love, she thought. It placed too heavy a burden on the other person. Successful relationships found a balance. That was the hard part, finding the balance.

He was bigger and stronger than me, and probably crazier. Although some might argue that last point.

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