Quotes from Frank Zappa

There is no such thing as a dirty word. Nor is there a word so powerful, that it's going to send the listener to the lake of fire upon hearing it.

You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline - it helps if you have some kind of football team, or some nuclear weapons, but in the very least you need a beer.

Tobacco is my favorite vegetable.

Reality is what it is, not what you want it to be.

You can't always write a chord ugly enough to say what you want to say, so sometimes you have to rely on a giraffe filled with whipped cream.

I have four children, and I want them to grow up in a country that has a working First Amendment.

My guitar wants to kill your mama.

There is more stupidity around than hydrogen and it has longer shelf life.

Music, in performance, is a type of sculpture. The air in the performance is sculpted into something.

There will never be a nuclear war; there's too much real estate involved.

Information is not knowledge. Knowledge is not wisdom. Wisdom is not truth. Truth is not beauty. Beauty is not love. Love is not music. Music is THE BEST.

Most people wouldn't know music if it came up and bit them on the ass.

Some scientists claim that hydrogen, because it is so plentiful, is the basic building block of the universe. I dispute that. I say there is more stupidity than hydrogen, and that is the basic building block of the universe.

No change in musical style will survive unless it is accompanied by a change in clothing style. Rock is to dress up to.

On the Planet of Baritone women, they talk low.

A mind is like a parachute. It doesn't work if it is not open.

You don't think I work 14 hours a day right now?! I mean, I still put in the hours, I still do the work.

Mr. Gorbachev has apparently stumbled onto one of the best-kept secrets in recent Soviet history: Communism doesn't work.

Ever try to have a conversation with someone on drugs? It just doesn't work.

Did he really choose Tammy to do his work?

I think it is good that books still exist, but they do make me sleepy.

Moving to Montana soon, gonna be a dental floss tycoon.

Do your job and do it right, life's a ball, TV tonight.

Believe it or not, there are places in the world where music is important. There are places in the world where all the arts are a matter of national pride.