Quotes About Humor

During his next visit, my father secretly decided that our bathroom needed towel hooks. Using nails that were too long, my father pierced the door, creating towel hooks on one side, medieval blinding devices on the other...No matter how inconvenient a household malfunction might be, Kazem can always make it worse, for free.

Meet Bob... Bob is in this cage because he tried to steal my cookie. Haha Bob, Haha.

Is it about a bicycle?

Only if we are secure in our beliefs can we see the comical side of the universe.

Get well cards have become so humorous that if you don't get sick you're missing half the fun.

My main point is to be funny if I can slip a message in there, fine.

Funny is an attitude.

Things can be funny only when we are in fun. When we're 'dead earnest ' humor is the only thing that is dead.

Funny is not a color. Being black is only good from the time you get from the curtain to the microphone.

I don't have a very quick sense of humor.

Ne prenez pas la vie au sérieux; de toute façon, vous n'en sortirez pas vivant Bernard Le Bovier de Fontenelle (11 février 1657- 9 janvier 1757) mort à 99 ans...

Woman first tempted man to eat; he took to drinking of his own accord.

Volim te je najmanje smešna re?enica na svetu.

Mom's hands flew to her mouth. Dada smiled, all of his beautiful white teeth with the gap in the middle sparkling at me from across the room. I gasped, and when I tried to speak the only thing that came out was a big, loud burp! Mom looked horrified. Dada turned away to keep from laughing out loud. I was so embarrassed. Had Bob heard that through the phone? "Whoa," came through the speaker. "That was one big, healthy belch." Yep, he heard. "So

My favorite animal is steak.

The telephone is a good way to talk to people without having to buy them a drink.

If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater... suggest that he wear a tail.

Favorite animal: steak.

Stand firm in your refusal to remain conscious during algebra. In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.

A mother-in-law dies only when another devil is needed in hell.

Readers, friends, if you turn these pages Put your prejudice aside, For, really, there's nothing here that's outrageous, Nothing sick, or bad — or contagious. Not that I sit here glowing with pride For my book: all you'll find is laughter: That's all the glory my heart is after, Seeing how sorrow eats you, defeats you. I'd rather write about laughing than crying, For laughter makes men human, and courageous.

I say and maintain, that of all torcheculs, arsewisps, bumfodders, tail-napkins, bunghole cleansers, and wipe-breeches, there is none in the world comparable to the neck of a goose ...

May the fire of St. Anthony fly up thy fundament.

To laugh is proper to man.