Quotes About Humor

First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly.

I sound. Like a demented rooster.

Are you all right?" Kendra asked. Warren grinned. "I'm surprised to be alive. That would have been a very big belly flop into a very dry pool. Here they come!" The

Why didn't Grandpa change you back?" Kendra asked. Grandma's eyebrows shot up. "Probably because I kept laying eggs for his breakfast.

Welcome to Australia," Seth announced in his best local accent, gesturing at their barren surroundings. After surveying the area for a moment, he frowned. "I expected more koalas.

Can I take him to my room?" Eve asked. "He's not a doll," Seth told her. "Don't dress him up." Eve made a face. "Why would I do that? I'd rather find a little ax and see how he does against a mouse.

Rollan glanced at Meilin and her panda. "What's your power going to be? Cuddling?

Zig looked Cole up and down. "You've got a glow to you, lad. You in love or something?" Cole laughed. "My body isn't dead yet.

It was the most hilarious thing that has ever happened," Pigeon agreed. "I'm just worried it might cost me my life. And that my mom won't be able to stop eating fudge long enough to hold a funeral. They'll probably just dump me in a hole in the backyard.

If we're attacked by corn dogs," Jeanine said with a straight face, "our enemies will be doomed.

What should we call the other statue?" Tanu asked. "Nancy," Seth said quickly.

I haven't been quite as close as Warren," Tanu said. "Probably because I'm a little saner.

The last thing we need is a giant magical cow running around loose. It could be total mayhem.

But it was an awful lot of responsibility to give to somebody who liked sticking French fries in his nostrils.

To somebody who hasn't had any milk, do you look like a guy or a cow?" Seth asked. Brunwin glared. "I mean bull," Seth amended. "A guy or a bull.

A crossbow?" Pigeon asked. I left my battle-ax in my other jeans," the man said.

You see, that is the sad, sorry, terrible thing about sarcasm. It's really funny.

Why hasn't anyone killed him yet?" "Dumb luck," Wit said. "In that I'm lucky you're all so dumb.

That hat looks ridiculous." "Fortunately, I can change hats," Wayne said, "while you, sir, are stuck with that face.

I don't talk to myself because I'm crazy." "No?" "I do it because I'm awesome.

Personally, I say, "Out of the frying pan and into the deadly pit filled with sharks who are wielding chainsaws with killer kittens stapled to them." However, that one's having a rough time catching on.

Personally, I like it much better when someone else does the decision making. That way you have legitimate grounds to whine and complain. I tend to find both whining and complaining quite interesting and amusing, though sometimes--unfortunately--it's hard to choose which one of the two I want to do. Sigh. LIfe can be so tough sometimes.

I can see what you're up to." "Five foot six inches," Shallan said. "I suspect that's all I will ever be up to, unfortunately.

Wayne's a little attached to that hat," Waxillium said. "He thinks it's lucky." Wayne: "It is lucky. I ain't never died while wearing that hat." Marasi frowned. "I ... I'm not sure I know how to respond." Wax: "That's a common reaction to Wayne.