Quotes About Humor

The trouble with Freud is that he never played the Glasgow Empire on a Saturday night after Rangers and Celtic had both lost.

I pick up Dylan. He certainly takes after his father: about three-quarters of his body weight seems to be head, and three-quarters of that is ears.

You can't really be strong until you can see a funny side to things.

You can't really be strong until you see a funny side to things.

You can't really be strong until you can see a funny side to things.

Because he knows you have to laugh at the things that hurt you just to keep yourself in balance, just to keep the world from running you plumb crazy. He knows there's a painful side; he knows my thumb smarts and his girlfriend has a bruised breast and the doctor is losing his glasses, but he won't let the pain blot out the humor no more'n he'll let the humor blot out the pain.

He knew you can't really be strong until you can see a funny side of things.

But he won't let the pain blot out the humor no more'n he'll let the humor blot out the pain.

The clever men at OxfordKnow all that there is to be knowed.But they none of them know one half as muchAs intelligent Mr. Toad!

I whirled to see the snake springing up from the ferns and bouncing towards us, fast. This time we turned and ran. Every time I looked around, the snake was still there. I wanted to laugh and scream at the same time. The little creature was ridiculous. It was terrifying, and it was also gaining on us.

Balance of emotions is what is important... and remembering to laugh at oneself. Alan Watts used to say that angels, like Daoist Immortals, can fly because they take themselves lightly!

Enlightenment is not an achievement; it is just the seeing of reality as it is. In fact, nirvana is simply what is. We have been staring at it all our lives, and yet so few of us get it. The fact is that life is at the same time lamentable and beautiful. When we realize this humorous and absurd beauty of life, what can we do but to burst into laughter?

My quest these days is to find my long lost inner child, but I'm afraid if I do, I'll end up with food in my hair and way too in love with the cats.

My mom loved to sing - and I'll go on record and say she was the worst singer ever. I'd get up and move away from her!

Rodney wasn't what you'd call eloquent, but he had a couple guys he used to drink with, so we got these bits of quadruple-drunk story: Rodney drunk when he told it, his friends drunk when they heard, then drunk again when they retold it to a bunch of drunks.

Phil didn't know he was dead until he read it in the paper. All things considered, he took it rather well.

I thought I became a comedian because I loved comedy and I liked making people laugh. But I became a comedian because by the time I was 23, I was so walled-off and f*cked-up that doing stand-up was the easiest way to go into a room full of strangers and make them like me so that no one would hurt me. I was onstage with the mindset of a 6-year-old from 23 to about 37.

I used to think you had to live this miserable life and that that would make you funnier, but you don't. The misery will come. The misery will find you. You don't need to go out of your way to sabotage yourself or get a friggin' drug habit or date a psycho.

Tip of the Week If you bought $1,000 worth of Nortel stock one year ago, it would now be worth $49. If you bought $1,000 worth of Budweiser (the beer, not the stock) one year ago, drank all the beer, and traded in the cans for the nickel deposit, you would have $79. My advice to you…start drinking heavily.

A year ago my approval rating was in the 30s, my nominee for the Supreme Court had just withdrawn, and my vice president had shot someone. Ah, those were the good ol' days.

The universe may not always play fair, but at least it's got a hell of a sense of humor.

It was always this way with our fathers. They made stories of cruelty seem so funny.

I do not really think Charlie knows much more about politics, history, or economics than I do. Like myself he was hit by a make-up towel almost before he was out of diapers.

I actually feel like, for a lot of my career, I wasn't able to show my comedic range. I did a lot of dramas and dramedies. I was on 'E.R.' That's not generally thought of as a funny show.