Quotes About Humor

Los dos éramos, por así decirlo, firmes partidarios del paro cardiaco como causa de muerte. El único inconveniente de una muerte tan repentina, dijo bromeando, es que uno ha de tener sus bienes bajo control en todo momento para estar seguro de no dejar ninguno de sus secretos, por no decir inclinaciones, a la posteridad. Contesté, en el mismo tono de broma, que ese era un pensamiento muy vanidoso.

Just beyond the gate, a neat yellow hole— someone pissed in the snow

We do not take humor seriously enough.

Barking dogs occasionally bite, but laughing men hardly ever shoot.

My biggest worry is that my wife (when I'm dead) will sell my fishing gear for what I said I paid for it.

He deserves Paradise who makes his companions laugh.

All of a sudden Yutaka realized he had created a cloud of dust all around him. Oh no! No! This sucks. This blows more than your mama! Hey, now's not the time to come up with stupid jokes!

Can't hear… call back… good luck…" Nïx, I know you're faking the static." She could picture her sister blowing into her fist directly at the receiver. The static abruptly stopped. Why?" It seemed less rude than the alternative." What's that?" Click.

Can't hear… call back… good luck…" "Nïx, I know you're faking the static." She could picture her sister blowing into her fist directly at the receiver. The static abruptly stopped. "Why?" "It seemed less rude than the alternative." "What's that?" Click.

Let's put the fun back in funeral!

Aingeal , there is only one thing on my body that's ten inches long, and if you'll recall, the scar is no' it.

You shouldn't give him a ride, Grace!" Meme snapped. "He's likely to strangle you and dump your body in the lake." "Is this true?" I asked Callahan. "I was thinking about it," he admitted.

Here's the thing, Grace," Cal said, a smile playing at the corner of his mouth. "Ever since that first day when you smacked me in the head with your field hockey stick-" "You just can't let that go, can you?" I muttered. He grinned fully now. "-and even when you hit me with the rake and dented my truck, and when you were spying on me from your attic and your dog was mauling me, Grace, I always knew you were the one for me.

Say it, woman." "It. Woman." "God, you're a pain.

OH!" KATE GRUNTED as she sat down behind her desk. "My side is killing me. I'm ovulating, I think. That sucker must be huge." "Must we discuss?" Jon asked. "Man up, weenie boy," Kate said. "You man up, Venus Williams," Jon replied. "I'm a gay home-ec teacher. I never have to man up. I never will man up. As God is my witness, I'll never man up again.

Gus, do I have to put you in a cage or something? Because I will! Don't push it, mister!" "As an officer of the court, I feel obliged to speak up and tell you that child imprisonment is against the law," I said. "Right. Well, then, I'll take that as your offer to babysit all four of my precious angels when you get home." "Then again, cages can be very comfortable.

Okay, we get it, Jodi-with-an-i," I said, smiling pleasantly up at her. "You have an adorable son and are still quite available. Dennis, however, is with me. If you would just take your boobs out of my boyfriend's face, I would deeply appreciate it.

Nick," I murmured, "should I ever head into the cellar armed only with a ladle after the police have just warned me that a psychotic killer is on the loose, please slap me.

Try a bikini next time." "Right. I'll also try setting myself on fire, since it would be just as fun.

God grant me the courage to date the men who aren't idiots. The serenity to accept the fact that many men are idiots. And the wisdom to know the difference

THE LAST TIME my husband and I had sex, I fell asleep. Not after. During.

I knock cheerfully on the super's door—shave-and-a-haircut, two-bits!

I'd known friends who went through this, the grim tracking of the ovulation cycle, the way making love becomes insemination, as romantic as a turkey baster. One of my college friends, in fact, had said she preferred the turkey baster. "I don't have to pretend that way,

Well, no point in crying over spilled milk. Spilled wine, yes.