Quotes About Humor

Show me a man with both feet on the ground and I'll show you a man who can't get his pants on.

They say I killed six or seven men for snoring. Well, it ain't true. I only killed one man for snoring.

It is as hard to satirize well a man of distinguished vices, as to praise well a man of distinguished virtues.

Punning is a talent which no man affects to despise but he that is without it.

The talent of turning men into ridicule, and exposing to laughter those one converses with, is the qualification of little ungenerous tempers.

There are some men who are witty when they are in a bad humor, and others only when they are sad.

To me, I've never understood why there is any question about are women as funny as men.

I also said, men are like curling irons, they never get out of your hair. And they are like government bonds, they take so long to mature.

If God hadn't meant us to hunt men, he wouldn't have given us Wonder Bras.

When I'm an old lady, I'm going to have my pick of the young men. They'll be like, 'She's Miss Mary Jane!' The young boys will think I'm a hot old lady.

Even in despair, man must laugh.

Dennis Thatcher, husband of Margaret Thatcher, when asked who wore the pants in his house, said "I do, and I also wash and iron them." I only like two kinds of men; domestic and foreign.

Good-fellowship, unflagging, is the prime requisite for success in our society, and the man or woman who smiles only for reasons of humor or pleasure is a deviate.

Men are like parking spots: sometimes I drive my car into them

I'd like to introduce a man with a lot of charm, talent, and wit. Unfortunately, he couldn't be here tonight, so instead . . .

Anybody who's been married to a man for forty odd years knows he's all talk.

I love men who make me laugh.

I see my role in the Bonzos as being the straight man, in many ways.

They call me the confuser. Is he a man... is he a woman? Ooh, I'm not sure if I mind.

I have no idea why it apparently takes three grown men to cook some hamburgers. One to cook, one to kibbitz, and one to insult the other two.

There is no such thing as a heterosexual male, only men who haven't met Oscar Wilde yet.

Oh! I don't think I would like to catch a sensible man. I shouldn't know what to talk to him about.

Wise men are not wise at all hours, and will speak five times from their taste or their humor, to once from their reason.

As funny as watching a man in a wig trying to hold down a job on a helipad