Quotes About Humor

Anger makes dull men witty, but it keeps them poor.

A good place to meet a man is at the dry cleaner. These men usually have jobs and bathe.

The duty of comedy is to correct men by amusing them.

He's the only man I know of who can hide his own easter eggs.

I come from the bush ... where men are men, and the sheep are nervous.

A black man will be elected President of the United States. I'm sorry, that's in the year 10,000.

You don't gossip while your man is driving. You sit there quietly until you're about 5 minutes from your destination then you say, would you like some road head?

I know that sounds weird, but it's hard to be scared or even angry at a guy in Spider-Man pajamas,"- Greg

There are many humorous things in the world; among them, the white man's notion that he is less savage than the other savages.

Man is rated the highest animal, at least among all animals who returned the questionnaire.

Men live by intervals of reason under the sovereignty of humor and passion.

I used to drink, I did, I had to quit. Man, I was an embarrassing drunk. I'd get pulled over by the cops, I'd be so drunk I'd be out dancing to their lights thinking I'd made it to another club.

Sometimes love can be so wrong/Like a fat man in a thong.

I have never pretended to be any kind of super-religious kind of man, but I feel very strongly that you can be funny without being dirty.

I come from a long ago era where men could be men and stereotypical humor didn't offend anybody.

Robert Redford used to be such a handsome man and now look at him: everything has dropped, expanded and turned a funny color.

One woman and one man might have been OK in your grandmother's day, but who wants to marry your grandmother? Not even your grandfather!

Men who wear turtlenecks look like turtles.

Who needs astrology? The wise man gets by on fortune cookies.

Once a woman passes a certain point in intelligence she finds it almost impossible to get a husband: she simply cannot go on listening without snickering.

A car hit a Jewish man. The paramedic says, "Are you comfortable?" The man says, "I make a good living."

I go for two kinds of men. The kind with muscles, and the kind without.

Get me a skinny frappuccino. I have no idea what that is - I would like to think you would be presented with a tiny Italian man.

The hour of noon has passed,' said Judge Fang. 'Let us go and get some Kentucky Fried Chicken.