Quotes About Humor

George Hamilton is one of the funniest men I have ever known.

In all honesty, we don't know what's in the hearts of other men. All I know is that I respect comedy and I know comedy. I would never, ever, ever take somebody else's joke.

It was a mixed marriage. I'm human, and he was a Klingon.

My favorite one to see is the metal bikini on men.

Dead men always have the last laugh. They win. They're dead. You can't hurt their feelings anymore.

Oh, come on," Clary said. "You're a vampire, not Spider-Man.

What women look for in a man: Breathing, IQ over 80, weight under 550 pounds, fewer than six ex-wives. What men look for in a woman: Pia Zadora as she was ten years ago.

a most excellent man, though I could have wished his trousers not quite so tight in some places and not quite so loose in others.

That'd be good. That'd be a right good laugh, man. Ye cannae catch me shuttin' up, man

I've never made love to a ghost but I have made love to men who are a few years away from becoming a ghost.

I think it's hilarious when middle-aged white men try to take themselves seriously. It makes me laugh.

I understand what my gift is, which is making people laugh, hopefully. It's more on that level. I don't need to be a leading man, I'm fine with that.

I don't think the public here buy this idea that women and men speak different comedic languages.

Shaq is rich. The white man who signs his check... is wealthy. "Ah, here you go, Shaq. Go buy yourself a bouncing car. Bling, bling!"

Most parts in comedy, they're not really written for men. They're written for, like, these boy-men.

I think that every man is afraid of his wife.

In the Year 2000 men will finally discover that the reason women go to the bathroom in pairs... is to make out.

A bank in Washington was robbed by two men in George W. Bush masks. Luckily, right afterwards two guys in President Obama masks came and bailed the bank out, so everything is fine.

Whole phases of comedy have become empty; the comic rejoinder has become every man's tool.

Self help books are pointless. Here's something for you... Men are from Mars, women are from Venus, and self help books are from Uranus.

Women wearing men's clothes are chic, men wearing women's clothes make us fall on the floor laughing.

Well, I guess I am about the livest dead man you ever saw; although I was once asked to accept a coffin.

Illy [Ray Illingworth] had the man-management skills of Basil Fawlty

The method preferred by most balding men for making themselves look silly is called the comb over.