Quotes About Humor

One shouldn't take life so seriously. No one gets out alive anyway.

If we couldnt laugh we would all go insane.

You know Death will get you in the end, but if you are smart and have a sense of humor, you can thumb your nose at it for awhile

Sail the main course in a simple sturdy craft. Keep her well stocked with short stories and long laughs. Go fast enough to get there but slow enough to see. Moderation seems to be the key.

If we couldn't laugh, we would all go insane.

We were playing a story game Bucky had invented called the Last Supper. It consisted of allowing those evil, avenging creatures of God—horseflies—to light on the exposed skin of your arm or leg and take a bite. At that point, you make up an epitaph, which you deliver to the horsefly as he eats his last meal, and then you flatten the little bastard. The speeches are voted on by those in attendance, and the best speech wins a bottle of wine.

Later, when Bob Hope came to visit us, he made a wisecrack about being a Republican and I announced that he would be moving from the Lincoln Bedroom to sleep in Amy's tree house.

Thank you leaf blowers, for making me look like the world's lamest Ghostbuster. I ain't afraid of no leaves.

Thank you adult mittens, for allowing me to give people the finger without them knowing it.

Thank you 'adults who wear back packs' for letting me know that I don't have to take you seriously

It funny? Huh? Huh?

I think you should take that trident of yours and stick it up your nose, fishboy!

Whatever happens we mustn't forget how to laugh

They reminded me of the cartoon I'd seen where one earthworm says to the other at a party, "Don't look now but Harry's been flirting with the wrong end of Sylvia for the last fifteen minutes.

Never try to teach a pig to sing. You'll annoy the pig and lose your voice.

I feel at the moment I can't complete, that I've become smug and pissy and I Haven't a sense of Humor.

You can't be nervous and amused at the same time. They're both powerful emotions and one overrides the other. If your sense of humor kicks in, you lose your case of nerves…at least according to the professor who taught the psychology class I took in college.

The next time you come to the Cookie Jar, the coffee's on me. You could probably bottle that stuff of yours and sell it for rat poison.

Michelle's Note: When I make these at my rented house just off the Macalester campus, I put the rolls in a box and write "FROZEN KIDNEYS FOR HANNAH'S CAT" on the box. So far, none of my roommates, every one of them a cookie hound, has ever opened the box to see what's inside.

How many books does she have? I asked her that and she said she had enough to make two brawny movers weep.

At least she'd finally figured out why the green leggings she wore were called tights. It was because they were tight. Extremely tight. So very tight that she felt like a sausage about to split open on a blazing hot barbecue grill.

I might call in to see you anyway,' she said. 'If only to annoy the curé.

Sexiness wears thin after awhile and beauty fades, but to be married to a man who makes you laugh every day, ah, now that is a treat.

When I was little I bragged about my firefighting father: my father would go to heaven, because if he went to hell he would put out all the fires