Quotes About Humor

It's normal to shy away from illness and death. It's natural to gravitate toward laughter and life.

Convincing my dog I really threw the ball is the closest I'll ever get to being a magician.

Without humor, life is boring. Without love, life is hopeless. Without friends like you, life is impossible.

That awkward moment when a package says 'Easy open' but you end up using scissors, knife, hammer, gun and a lightsaber trying to open it.

If there was anything that depressed him more than his own cynicism, it was that quite often it still wasn't as cynical as real life.

Lifes like a bird, its pretty cute until it dumps on your head.

Life is way too short to safely remove a USB.

I love it when someone's laugh is funnier than the joke.

If you make a wish at 11:11 on 11/11/11 it will come true. Provided that your wish was to waste seconds of your life.

Those who go to bed with Ichy bum-wake up with stinky finger!

All those who believe in telekinesis, raise my hand.

I started out with nothin' and still have most of it left.

Apparently, if you laugh for 24 hours straight you get a six-pack. New life goal? I think so.

How many people here have telekinetic powers? Raise my hand.

I told my psychiatrist everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous; everyone hasn't met me yet

Flying is simple; just throw yourself on the ground and miss.

I hope life isn't a joke, because I don't get it.

Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyways.

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car.

Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.

Old fishermen never die, they just smell that way.

I love being my silly ole self! Lifes a lot better when you have a good sense of humor and you smile.

If I studied all my life, I couldn't think up half the number of funny things passed in one session of congress.

Life isn't all haha hehe.