Quotes About Humor

Hark to the whimper of the seagull. / He weeps because he's not an ea-gull. / Suppose you were, you silly seagull. / Could you explain it to your she-gull?

Think of what would happen to us in America if there were no humorists; life would be one long Congressional Record

Life's more amusing than we thought.

When all this started, I asked myself, 'Am I going to withdraw from the world, like most people do, or am I going to live?' I decided I am going to live-or at least try to live-the way I want, with dignity, with courage, with humor, with composure.

Laugh at yourself and at life. Not in the spirit of derision or whining self-pity, but as a remedy, a miracle drug, that will ease your pain, cure your depression, and help you to put in perspective that seemingly terrible defeat and worry with laughter at your predicaments, thus freeing your mind to think clearly toward the solution that is certain to come. Never take yourself too seriously.

Penguins mate for life. That doesn't surprise me much because they all look alike. It's not like they're going to meet a really new, great looking penguin someday.

In my life, I have prayed but one prayer: oh Lord, make my enemies ridiculous. And God granted it.

Life is like a grapefruit. Well, it's sort of orangy-yellow and dimpled on the outside, wet and squidgy in the middle. It's got pips inside, too. Oh, and some people have a half a one for breakfast.

The best thing you've ever done for me¦is to help me take my life less seriously¦cuz its only life after all¦

I like nonsense, it wakes up the brain cells. Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living, It's a way of looking at life through the wrong end of a telescope. Which is what I do, And that enables you to laugh at life's realities.

He's not pining, he's passed on. This parrot is no more. He has ceased to be. He's expired and gone to meet his maker. He's a stiff, bereft of life, he rests in peace. If you hadn't have nailed him to the perch he'd be pushing up the daisies. He's rung down the curtain and joined the choir invisible. This is an ex-parrot!

A broken heart is what makes life so wonderful five years later, when you see that special guy in an elevator and he is fat and smoking and saying 'Long time no see'.

I will find humor in my everyday life by looking for people I can laugh at.

Through humor, you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers. And once you find laughter, no matter how painful your situation might be, you can survive it.

Never take life too seriously; after all, no one gets out of it alive.

Life is one fool thing after another whereas love is two fool things after each other.

The only way a woman can ever reform her husband is by boring him so completely that he loses all possible interest in life.

What to do if you find yourself stuck in a crack in the ground underneath a giant boulder you can't move, with no hope of rescue. Consider how lucky you are that life has been good to you so far. Alternatively, if life hasn't been good to you so far, which given your current circumstances seems more likely, consider how lucky you are that it won't be troubling you much longer.

Don't take life too seriously. It's only a temporary condition.

Do not take life too seriously; you will never get out of it alive.

Do the best you can, and don't take life too serious.

Don't worry about life, you're not going to survive it anyway.

If it wasn't for pick-pockets I'd have no sex life at all.

Life is just a bowl of pits.