Quotes About Humor

It was nice that you guys have such a good sense of humor, because some people don't have the ability to laugh at something.

I used to be a hot-tar roofer. Yeah, I remember that... day.

I had a ploughman's lunch the other day. He wasn't very happy.

A lot of people don't like bumper stickers. I don't mind bumper stickers. To me a bumper sticker is a shortcut. It's like a little sign that says 'Hey, let's never hang out.'

One time I stayed at a haunted motel. When I checked into my room, there was a sheet on the floor, and I thought it was a ghost that had passed out, so I kicked it.

Tourists - have some fun with New york's hard-boiled cabbies. When you get to your destination, say to your driver, "Pay? I was hitchhiking."

Another day gone and no jokes.

The boat was so old; it must have been launched when Long John Silver had two legs and an egg on his shoulder.

You might be a redneck if... the blue book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas it has in it.

As we look for humor, seek for the eternal perspective, understnd the principle of compensation, and draw near to our Heavenly Father, we can endure heardship and trial.

Humor could not flourish in a wholly serious and rational atmosphere.

Humor is when the joke's on you but hits the other fellow first -- before it boomerangs.

In the event of a cabin failure, oxygen masks will drop from the ceiling, and untangling them will annoy you before you die.

It's a great day in America when white people, black people and Latinos can all come together and pick on another minority.

Get a in clothes dryer with Magic Johnson and some razorblades.

How ghastly for her, people actually thinking, with their brains, and right next door. Oh, the travesty of it all.

The saints are never the kind of killjoy spinster aunts who go in for faultfinding and lack all sense of humor.

I can read minds, but I'm illiterate.

My father only hit me once, but he used a Volvo.

Humor [in a scene] is not jokes. It is that attitude toward being alive without which you would long ago have jumped off the 59th Street Bridge.

Good humor is one of the preservatives of our peace and tranquility.

My headshot is a scratch and sniff, it smells like failure and onions.

Kids did really well in their A levels, how do we respond? 'A Levels are getting easier, in my day you had to do fifty questions in a minute, if you got one wrong, they killed your dad!

Do you think George Bush actually knows who Gordon Brown is? He probably just thinks Tony Blair's put on weight and had a mild stroke.