Quotes About Humor

Man, quit hugging me. You are a perv. (Fang) You're such an asshole. (Vane) Daddy said a bad word! (Trace) You tell him, pup. Keep your daddy straight. (Fang)

You still haven't eaten your muffin. (Sunshine) 'Yeah, right. He still hadn't eaten his boots either, and he'd rather feast on one of them than that thing in her hand.' (Talon)

Nick moved over to Amanda, who seemed to be the safest bet in this family of homicidal loons. Amanda glanced at him over her shoulder. "For the record, if they attack, I'm throwing you at them and running for the door." "Gee, thanks." She shrugged. "How you think I've survived so long in this family?

I'm telling you people; its a zombie attack. Z to the Oto the M to the B to the I,E. ZOMBIE... -Bubba

Akri? Can I keep him? See, he good eating. Lots of fat on this one. (Simi) No, Simi. You can't keep the baby. His mother would miss him. (Acheron) But he want to go home with the Simi. He said so. (Simi) No, Simi. (Acheron) No Simi, no food. Nag, nag, nag. (Simi)

And you, my best friend on earth, my soul sister who shares Chunky Monkey scoops and beefcake e-mails at the drop of a hat, the woman who made me wear a frothy, ruffled lime-colored bridesmaid dress that added fifteen pounds to my hips, are going to spill your guts to me, aren't you? (Sunshine) No fair and the dress wasn't lime, it was mint. (Selena) It was lime-icky green and I looked like a sick pistachio. (Sunshine)

Dazed, Nick nodded, then looked to Caleb. "I'm such an effing idiot." "We knew that," he said drily. "We definitely didn't have to throw you into a coma for that little-known nugget.

See what? I didn't see anything. There were no scary people there. Nothing freaky. I'm going home now and tomorrow I'm going to have the doctors check for a brain tumor. Full battery of tests. Whole nine yard. Whatever's wrong with me, we'll find it and deal with it. At this point, my vote is either tumor or space alien testing. Either one works for me. (Geary)

You seriously lack people skills. (Fang) And I flunked anger management the moment I put the counselor through a stone wall. (Thorn)

Excuse me? Jess asked in disbelief. This is Frozen Zarek I'm talking to, right? Not some weird pod person? He shook his head at Jess's joking. It's me, dickless. Hey, now, that's way too personal. I don't need to know that much about you.

Grandma, please. It's okay. Dad's doing a great job. I give him kudos for at least being calm and rational, and not losing his temper with everyone around him who isn't in childbirth. And he has yet to start shooting lighting bolts at people. Poor Damien still has a burn scar." – Kat

In that case, we need to seriously arm ourselves. (Sin) Hail Mary, full of grace – (Kish) What are you doing? You're not Catholic. (Damien) Yeah, but I'm feeling really religious all of a sudden and it seemed like a good idea. (Kish)

Do you own anything not pink? (Talon) I have a purple razor if you'd rather. (Sunshine) Please. (Talon) (She pulled out a darker pink one.) That's not purple. It's pink too. (Talon) Well, that's all I have unless you want my X-Acto blade. (Sunshine)

Yeah. Kip gets to guard you and I get to house-sit. Life bites the big tee-tawa. (Syn)

Nice knees, bud, but the hairy legs could use a Bush Hog. (Kyrian)

No worries. They don't scare me. (Devyn) All right, but if my brain matter ends up smeared against a wall, I'll never forgive you. (Alix)

I agree, Dad. I was just explaining to the woman why we don't look anything alike and why you would have been younger than me when I was born. It doesn't mean I don't love you 'cause you know I do. Make one snotty comment in anger when you're twelve years old going through puberty and getting grounded, and you pay for it for the rest of your life. Parents ain't got no sense of humor. (Omari)

In spite of rumourd, I haven't completely gone to the darkside yet. But damn, those cookies are good. Come to the dark side. We have cookies.

Vik] Okay, I'll drop the subject. But if you ever do that to me again, I'll stab you in the penis, which I'm sure will hurt." [Syn] "Yeah, it would." [Vik] "Good. Now I'm powering down for a bit to conserve my power.

Yet you're helping me. Why? (Arik) Nothing better to do. Eternity is boring. Really boring. I'm hoping that when you pop the seal on Atlantis, there will be a giant explosion to add some humor and interest to my life. If we're really lucky, Apollymi will come out and thoroughly entertain us with a massive fireworks display. Hell, if she does half of what she did last time, there will be belly rolls aplenty for those of us who hate the Olympians and humanity. (Solin)

Ahhh, you two are special friends. Nick How do you mean? Kyrian He thinks we're a couple Ash No No No Definitely not. Not that Acheron is not an attractive man, not that I've ever really noticed whether or not he's attractive, but male is not my type. Kyrian

So we're talking into death? (Alix) Gods, I hope not. I don't have on the right boots for it. These are only good for a mild ass-whipping. (Devyn)

Jess:Sasha? I need some tissue to pack my nose with. Sasha:Is that hygienically sound? Jess:Sasha... Sasha:Fine, but if you get toxic shock up your nose, buddy, remember I warned you. Jess pulled a couple out and wedged them into his nostrils. He gave Abigail a sheepish smile. Sexy, right? Abby: Oh yeah, baby. You're so hot right now, if I was a chicken I'd lay hard-boiled eggs.

Zarek shrugged, taking it in stride. I'm an asshole. I admit it. I've been going to weekly Assholes Anonymous meetings, but it takes a long time to undo a few thousand years of habit. And to think you have even more years to undo than me. -ZAREK